Sleepless Nights

I was standing in the bathtub wearing nothing but a bra and track pants when Nathan got home from work this afternoon. Bear in mind that I am about ready to pop, so it can’t have been the sexiest thing he has ever seen.

But I suppose you need some back story.

Dinner tonight was going to be a throw together meal of chicken boccocini. I tend to boil the chicken first so that when I cook it the second time it isn’t A) overtly fatty and B) likely to end up raw in the middle. I have a tendency to poke things while they are cooking, which sausages? Fine. A pot of boiling chicken with bright orange fat floating on the surface? Not so fine. Being the clumsy pregnant woman that I am, I managed to splash myself with bright orange fat.

Not such a big deal, say, if I was wearing one of Nathan’s t-shirts. Instead I was in one of my only (fitting) maternity tops and so I freaked out a little and ran to the bathroom to rub it with soaker and get it in the washing machine.

Trust me, I am not that anal on any other given day.

I rinsed the top in Amy’s bathwater and then realised just how grubby the bath tub was.

And being approximately eleventy months pregnant, I decided that I just couldn’t live with a grotty bathtub for a moment more.

Up until that point, I always thought that the idea of a pregnant woman scrubbing her bathtub by hand was a sort of myth. Not true apparently, because dude, you should have seen me.

I will just remind you I was wearing nothing but a bra and track pants at this point. Perfect bathtub cleaning garments.

I started off just scrubbing with a face washer and Amy’s soapy water. I quickly realised that it was useless (unless I had of wanted to scrape the crud off with my fingernails and honestly, I just wasn’t that committed) and moved on to the big guns.

Bicarbonate Soda.

The BEST cleaning product ever.

Ever.

And I just happened to have bought 2 bags the other day at the supermarket. Prophetic? Probably.

I grabbed a scrubber, threw some bi-carb in the now empty bath and went to town.

45 minutes later, the bath tub was cleaner than I had ever seen it. I was just rinsing all the bi-carby bits down the drain (Bi-carb. Also good for unblocking drains) when Nathan walked in the door and caught me in all my glory.

After his ‘What on earth ARE you doing?’ question, he laughed. And then spent the next 10 minutes snickering at me.

All I can say? Let’s hope that the whole myth of NEEDING to scrub the bath right before you go into labour is not actually a myth. I could definitely handle having this baby out where I can hug and hold him already.

Because if he decides to hang around in there much longer, not only will I need a helluva lot more chocolate in order to cope, but I might decide the bathtub needs cleaning again.

And I’m not sure I could handle that.

So it’s been a long time since I did Weekly Winners. Do you think it could be because prior to Friday, I had a camera I didn’t much like using?

Anyway, not much has been happening. We went to the park for lunch Saturday and Amy had a a lot of fun.

I went a little bit mad with my macro setting and had a ball. Unfortunately it was too cold for any bees to be out or goodness knows I would have been trying my best to snap them as well.

Amy and I played on the swings together. I was secretly hoping that the downward force of the swing would get my labour started, but no luck. Sigh.

Toes. Because I just couldn’t resist.

It’s nice to be able to snap photos from a distance. I was about 30m away from Amy here.

A twisty turny tree down by the rivulet. Everything is lovely and green, but there is still no water flowing through there. Bloody drought.

Loving my macro setting.

Playing with the manual focus because I couldn’t help myself.

And finally, here I am 37 weeks and 2 days along. I can’t breathe anymore, walking is horrid and I am permanently tired. I think we can safely say that I am very VERY ready to be done and to have my baby here. At least once he is here sleeping and eating will at least be a possibilty, even if it is a remote one. Plus, breathing -  that all too essential thing, will be much easier. *puff pant puff pant*

I would like to point out that at my antenatal appointment on Friday, I was measuring 35cm - about 2 weeks behind where I *should* be at (if I was average, and apparently I am not). For comparison’s sake, at 2 days past full term with Amy, I was measuring 33cm. I am officially bigger now that I have ever been before.

Official due date is the 25th of January. MY due date (based on ovulation and when I got a positive test) is the 22nd of January. Still much too far away in my opinion.

Which leaves me with one last thing.

Can’t I be done now? Please?

To see more Weekly Winners, visit Lotus at Sarcastic Mom

Last night as I was cooking dinner, I realised I had been yelling at Seven to stop barking for an awfully long time. Strangely enough, she was barking near the house, normally all barking occurs at the property line as she protects us from strange people trying to post letters or answer mobile phones.

So, I did what anyone would do. I yelled some more and then headed outside to investigate. Lo and behold, what did I find but an echidna! Quite common in Tassie, not so common on my actual property.

The poor little thing was terrified and had buried itself in the hay up against the house.

I called the dog inside figuring that the echidna would trundle away once s/he wasn’t scared anymore.

However, 17 hours later? The echidna has done nothing but burrow into the hay more, creating itself a little tunnel and hidey hole.

Now I have NO problems with an echinda taking up residence in my backyard. God knows that we have enough ants about the place to feed an army of echidnas and Amy thinks it’s fantastic. The cat and Seven however? Are less than impressed.

Seven seems to think that she needs to protect us from the spikey burrowing thing and the cat isn’t sure whether to ignore it, or to spend all it’s time wandering around eyeing the moving hay uneasily whilst puffing up to 3x her normal size.

[An impressive feat when you consider that the cat is due to have kittens any day now and is therefore as big as a basketball]

So to the disgust of my domestic pets, we have an echidna living in our yard now. Ner ner.

Unfortunately Seven can’t seem to stop barking at it. I wonder how long until my ears start to bleed?

****

Also last night, [not while I was cooking dinner] Nathan discovered why Seven barks at apparently nothing.

There is a possum, living in the giant pine tree nearby.

This possum likes to come into our yard and run in circles taunting Seven to chase it. When Seven obliges, the possum darts away up the nearest tree where Seven can’t get to it.

Sort of like how your younger siblings used to taunt you when you were a kid, only as soon as you went and told on them, they promptly looked all angelic and you got into trouble for making things up? Or as soon as you went to chase and hurt them, they ran behind your mothers knees to hide?

Yeah, the possum has been doing that to Seven.

****

So an echinda making a home in the backyard and a possum that has learnt to tease the dog.

What will be next?

****

Also, what is the world coming to when spellcheck doesn’t recognise the word ‘echidna’? It’s not like I am talking about some kind of exotic animal here. Sheesh!

So I was about to write a New Years Eve post, but then Paris Hilton came on TV and I was stuck looking at her, trying to work out who had been showing the most boobage. Paris Hilton? Or my cousin?

Hmmmm.

I’m almost tempted to say my cousin because her dress was most definitely cut lower that Paris’s.

Moving right along…

It’s the last day of the year and everywhere I look bloggers are doing a yearly recap or they are talking about their resolutions or whatever. Which is fine, but really, it’s not something I want to do all that badly. 2008 was great in some respects and pretty downright awful in others and I don’t think I have the energy to recap. Also resolutions? Not something I do or have ever done. Ever. Sue me.

I mean, I could talk about how I have had to put my laptop down twice since starting this blog post to go and change Amy’s nappy. Or that said nappy had the consistency of chocolate sauce just without the delicious smell that one associates with chocolate.

I could also talk about how I just found the hugest chunk of snot in my hair courtesy of Amy who appears to be leaking bodily fluids like a sieve, but even the thought of the cold snot is squicking me out a little, so we’ll just not think about it too much anymore.

What are we left with?

Pregnancy?

Hell, that’s always good for a few paragraphs.

I had been hanging on New Years Eve as a good day to give birth. In fact, it would have been an excellent day. However, seeing as how New Years Eve has only approximately 5.5 hours left to go, I doubt very much I will be having the baby today. Therefore, by my thinking BRING ON 2009!

If I could walk without flinching I would be walking around the property line, stopping every once in a while to do star jumps. We’re officially Full Term now, so anytime this baby decides to appear is good with me.

I kind of miss walking and sleeping without pain and all that jazz.

[And if some smart arse jumps in and tells me that 'well you KNOW you will be sleeping less when he arrives, don't you?' I might just have to throw something disgusting at them. Like Amy's nappy. OF COURSE I know I will be sleeping less, but I fully guarantee that the less sleep I will be getting will be much more restful because at least I will be able to roll over without feeling like someone is cleaving my pelvis in half with an axe. Hmmph. Also walking.]

So yes, very ready to be done and to have him here.

You hear that baby? ANYTIME you want to come out and meet us is good with me.

I had a few hours of contractions yesterday morning, but they weren’t too painful (read: I could still talk through them) and they petered out to nothing.

However I have discovered that trying to use a heat pack while Amy is awake is useless. Someone keeps stealing it while declaring ‘TankYOU Mummy! It’s Amy’s warm! Nice warm, TankYOU Mummy!’

If I heat up both heat packs? She steals them both.

Both heat packs AND the hot water bottle? Yeah, don’t even think about it. They are all Amy’s apparently.

Sigh. Good thing she isn’t going to be about while I am giving birth. She would probably steal all my pillows along with the juice and heat packs.

Toddlers = no concept of sharing, unless they want something of yours. Then sharing is a big deal ['You needa SHARE Mummy! SHARE wiv Amy!']

So yeah, bring on 2009 and the arrival of this little one. Then Amy will HAVE to learn to share and I might be allowed to use my own heat pack again.

[Actual non-humorous updates? My pelvis is more excruciating than ever. We're at 37 weeks now, so I'm counting down the days until I can start to heal again. Which hip is going to hurt on any given day is still like a coin toss though. Everything is more than ready for his arrival, except for my hospital bag being packed. Heh.

Amy is doing really well, she finally clicked that there is a real baby in my tummy. It probably helped that she had to come into the Pregnancy Assessment Centre - PAC - with me Xmas night when I needed to be checked out for funny vision and numb hands. She got to hear his heartbeat as well as look at the posters of the babies in the uterus. Not entirely sure that she has got the concept completely, but hey too late to turn back now.

We also have some sort of virus that has left me chesty and Amy leaking snot and tears and fevery liquids everywhere. Thank god for Panadol.

Also, my camera is broken. Hence the lack of a 37 week photo. Shall need to buy a new camera before I go insane.

And that's me for 2008! Thankyou to everyone who reads here.]