So today I was sitting on the couch with Amy, reading my book and sharing her 2 minute noodles (don’t judge me here).
When! All of a sudden! A GINORMOUSLY HUGE SPIDER crawled out from behind a picture. Luckily, said picture was on the opposite wall to Amy and I, so we were able to observe the spider.
My thoughts?
‘Geez that is a big spider. That is one big fucking spider. I don’t think I have seen a spider quite that big for a while. My word am I glad it is on that wall, not this wall. Uhmmmmmm “Natty?!!! Come here please and rescue us?” from the ginormously huge spider that looks like it could eat my face.’
Amy’s thoughts?
‘Look! Mummy! Spidey! Spidey Mummy, LOOK! Spidey! Dere! Big Spidey! LOOK! LOOK! LOOK! Can you see? SPIDEY MUMMY!’
Yeah, I think I passed my total lack of fear onto my daughter. All she wanted to do was get close enough to touch it!
So I made Nathan come inside and rescue the spider from our toddler. What? Me? I wasn’t going near the thing! I might not be *scared* of spiders, but I am not going to taunt one into jumping on my face and nomming on me!
A container was procured and said spider was captured with a minimum of fuss. If you don’t count Amy REALLY wanting to touch the thing.
Then? Nathan went and released it near our boundary fence, away from toddlers, pregnant partners and cats. It can go about it’s business without fear of toddler attack.
But – before Nathan released it, I totally photographed it to share with you. I hope *someone* at least squeals.
And honestly, no joking, this spider was at least as big as my hand when all my fingers are splayed out. And no, I don’t have small hands in the slightest. This spider could give my cats a run for their money. Actually, if I had to put money on it, I would bet on the spider walking away while the cats nursed injuries.
It was that big.
And yes, I watermarked it so that no one could steal the image and use it without my permission. Somewhere, someone out there is googling for GINORMOUS SPIDER IMAGE. I don’t want them pinching mine.
Comments
59 responses to “NOT the spider that was in my cleavage.”
It’s a beautiful spider.
Oh my sweet lord, that would have scared the crap out of me! I looked it up on the Australian spider identification website and it looks like its a Huntsman. Seriously, you are super cool not to freak the heck out!
Sarahs last blog post..
That’s so funny. Hubby (bless his little heart) found a huntsman about that size on the OUTSIDE of the window above our back door last night. He came to ask me what to do with it. He was shitting himself. Bless his little heart.
Alis last blog post..Empty
hehehehehe
frogpondsrocks last blog post..Get your band-aids ready…
wow..
thats a biggie.. 🙂
Tazs last blog post..53 Weeks Old
OHHH MANNNNN!!! And I thought the killer brown recluses here were bad. And you’re right to watermark that image; it’s too tempting to steal pictures of ginormously large spiders and post them.
BTW I’ve had whole blog posts sometimes copied and then posted on someone else’s blog like they wrote it. How sad is that? Like their life is so sad they have to steal mine?? OK, that’s realllly sad.
Mrs. Cs last blog post..Swearing?
HOLY SHIT THAT’S A BIG SPIDER! I’m not normally super afraid of spiders or bugs. I mean, I don’t want them ON me, but I don’t get terrified. But if I saw that sucker, especially IN MY HOUSE, I’d have to move to anohther continent.
Jennis last blog post..Listless Mondays: Pet Peeves
That thing is big enough to have it’s own postal code.
witchypoos last blog post..Time
I would have killed that thing. Dead. And then had bad dreams that it’s family was going to come and get their revenge when I wasn’t looking.
sherendipitys last blog post..Because I’m gross like that.
And that, right there, despite the lovely weather, lovelier landscape, and loveliest people, is why I will never be able to move to Australia. *shudder*
badness joness last blog post..I feel the Crazies coming on….
Eeew. Yuck. Oh my.
Debs last blog post..You have to see this.
OMFG I would freak out if that was in my house !
Jenns last blog post..Another Giveaway !
Sometimes I am so happy I live in Michigan. Our spiders can be easily squashed with shoes and are harmless enough.
nikkis last blog post..Never mess with the original
Looks like a rain spider that we get here – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sparassidae. Apparently called wood spiders in your part of the world
They’re scary looking things!! And you should see how big their nests get!!
Jeanettes last blog post..Balancing on a ball
Fuck a duck and make him quack. That’s huge.
Rees last blog post..More MeMe
WOW!!!! Oh My GOD THAT IS ONE BIG SPIDER!!!!!!! Do you know what kind it is? Oh by the way I squealed and I like spiders but that is one big fucking spider!
Suzies last blog post..This Too Shall Pass
Beautiful spider.
But I think I enjoy it better on my computer screen then in real life.
Dinas last blog post..Things I Learned From Tim Flannery
Holy *curse word*
That’s awesome! I love spiders. Especially when they’re small and not in my house.
Ashs last blog post..Through bottle caps.
That guy totally skeeves me out. On the other hand, I think I have a pair of pumps in the colors he’s sporting.
anne nahms last blog post..NaNoHalfAssMo
As my hero Peter Boyle as Ray’s father would say, Holy Crap!! And a Huntsman, at that. Aren’t they, like, dangerous?
lceels last blog post..Shortsighted
I will never sleep again. That’s it, I am so sending the snow to you in the hopes that THAT demon spawn and all it’s baby demon spawns will DIE!
Cats last blog post..Selfish-less-ness
Note to self: NEVER, EVER VISIT NEW ZEALAND.
(Not without a bazooka to take out the likes of that thing. Good god.)
Holy shit. That is a big spider.
Sarah, Goon Squad Sarahs last blog post..Quick Favor
WOW, that is a big spider.
John Edwardss last blog post..Germantown Real Estate
WOW That is a very big spider. I would not have been as clam as you seemed to be.
Megans last blog post..Life again
So, uh, I managed to read it with the spider under or over the scrolled bitty… phew!
Also… EEEEK!
Marylins last blog post..There’s something I have to tell you.
Shut the F up! That thing was in your house? I think I would have shat my pants!
This post was WAYYYYYY scarier than the ghost posts I just put up.
EEEEEKKKKK!!!!
Kats last blog post..Birthday Blessings
I am so freaking scared of spiders and this is one nasty huge one!
Last night we thought our garage cat (Hailey) was bit by a nasty spider or something… She was acting all kooked out of her mind like she was hallucinating or something.
What is with all the spiders these days? Scary! I wonder what kind it was…
Talinas last blog post..Trying to have a home birth in Evansville, Indiana…
Thank god it wasn’t in your cleavage, there wouldn’t have been room for anything else. Although what else you’d keep in your cleavage I don’t know. My hair falls out an enormous amount and is often to be found in balls on the floor. One day my toddler walked up to me with a handful of “mummy’s hair”. It was a spider. I screamed. I was so proud of myself! Well done to your hero for evicting it (before it got to the cats).
I love that Megan thought you were clam!
Barbaras last blog post..302/366 – Help!
Ok Im back. I had to see it again. That is so crazy. I don’t know how Id handle that. Maybe when your done making me the mouse coat you can throw in a spider tiara. Zowie!
Suzies last blog post..This Too Shall Pass
I’m sitting here with my hand splayed out… thinking “if something THAT BIG crawled out from behind a picture on the wall, I’d have to burn down the house”. I’m so glad I live in a climate devoid of Spidey’s that ginormous!!
Hyphen Mamas last blog post..Bullet Point Friday
you ought to be ashamed feeding amy two minute noodles. i myself feed mine only the best THREE minute noodles!
Memarie Lanes last blog post..What I’d Like You to Know: The Shopping Cart Villain
AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHH!!
Getitawaygetitiawaygetitaway!!!!!!!
*rocking*
That is the biggest spider I have seen in FOREVER.
tiffs last blog post..Bone to be wild!
That is so many kinds of wrong. And that first commenter that called it a beautiful spider, what is up with her?? I was sent here to see this picture by someone who commented on my spider post form yesterday. I warned her I would come after her if I had bad dreams. I’m thinking she’s a goner.
Ah. Oops. I don’t know why I assumed you were in NZ…? Apologies! I guess then my comments should read that I should NEVER, EVER VISIT AUSTRALIA (without the bazooka, etc.). We just don’t grow spiders that big where I live. Thank all things holy.
Okay, in the interests of not repeating what everyone else said (“big spider,” “not one I would want in my bedroom” etc, although I would not have called you clam…)
I will instead tell you that I laughed out loud when I saw that you had tagged this one “goddamn animals”.
Yesterday a fox ran through my neighborhood. That was pretty cool. I would rather have a fox run past my back door than a big ass spider in my bedroom.
I cannot believe this. In keeping with how crappy my week is going, while I was typing this comment Tess yelled for me because she saw something black run across her bedroom floor and into the black hole that is her closet.
I have chosen to wait til Mark gets home to dig around and see if we have a spider or a goddamn mouse or a bug of some kind. Because those are the moments that you should share with your loved one, especially if he is bigger and less creeped out than you.
julies last blog post..Argh.
GAW! Why did I even look!
Taras last blog post..Colin is cracking me up!
I’m not scared of spiders either. I just think they’re creepy and crawly and make me nervous, and I won’t have anything to do with them. Other than that, they’re pretty cool.
OH MY HOLY SH- FU- GO- *choke choke* I am not squeamish, but THAT was HORRID.
yuck
That’s one heckuva spider. And pretty too.
BAHAHAHAHAHAAA I am loving your comments Veronica..and I don’t think that I would call you clam either..
DAMN! That is one huge spider. I don’t think I have ever seen something like that in nature. And by nature I mean my urban jungle. Wow, that sort of thing look slike it belongs in a zoo!
Excuse me…vomit.
Xbox4NappyRashs last blog post..ET goes to bed
ACK!
Burgh Babys last blog post..Flakey
Whoa that spider is titanic size! That happened to me too, as I recently celebrated my birthday with my family in our backyard. My hubby’s present was a a gorgeous diamond necklace he bought from http://www.idonowidont.com that he was placing on my neck. Suddenly I saw a big furry spider walk right across the picnic table, we screamed and had the rest of my party in the house!
Yesterday, as I was writing that comment up there, Tess saw something —
Yeah. It was a goddamn mouse.
It turned into a really pretty funny moment, though. I will blog it today or tomorrow…
julies last blog post..Argh.
That is a gross spider!!! Yuck!!!
Micheles last blog post..And…it’s breadsticks!
And you may keep your ginormous arachnids all to your little lonesome down there in the Apple Isle, Vonnie *shudder*
Another reason for bringing in border security and quarantine restrictions for the mainland lol 😛 (j/k)
Jaynes last blog post..Trivial History October 30
Oh yuck Veronica. I’m afraid I would have reached for my trusty bug spray and blasted the shit out of it!! What can I say, insects can live outside my house (preferably outside a 3 metre perimeter) but if they come in uninvited…well they have to die.
Holy Crap- that is ridiculous. That belongs on Animal Planet- not in your house! I am now lifting my feet so I can sit cross legged while reading blogs. I think I feel itchy now too…
Lindsay Lebresco (Graco)s last blog post..Wondrous Wednesday #45
ACK!! Holy shit … I would have lost it. Spiders creep me out.
Jenn Fls last blog post..Day One
OMF’nG!
That makes me feel better about bizzaro Kansas spiders!
That is SERIOUSLY disturbing. I wish your hand was in the photo because i don’t really believe it was that big.
KATs last blog post..SCARY
I mean – I CAN’T believe it. Or I’ll have nightmares.
KATs last blog post..SCARY
HOLLY SH@* NOW I KNOW THERE IS NO WAY I WILL BE GOING TO ENGLAND WITH MY FRIEND IN JAN,,, NOT WITH THAT STUFF THERE,,, enjoy your resting and mmmmmmmmmm stay the hell away from those things.
Just a moms last blog post..BE CAREFUL WHAT WORDS YOU USE,,,,,
I can’t believe the size of that thing! I’d be buying a baseball bat.
Juan
Juan Luiss last blog post..Spoiled Ribs – Common Sense, Meet Customer Service
Oh man….spiders are the only thing in this world that make me act like I have breasts and two gallons of estrogen flowing through me….
That’s a creature left over from the prehistoric ages!
OMG. I would have screamed bloody murder and fled the room, locked the door behind me and called John Goodman.
crazylovescompanys last blog post..Get it done baby, yeah!