An Indoor Pond

by Veronica on April 7, 2008

in Life

You know how when you are looking for one thing, you inevitably find another? Well…

Yesterday I was in the shower and Nathan came rushing in telling me we had a problem.

‘We have MICE!’

‘How do you know?’

‘I saw one. Der.’

‘Oh okay. Ummm, let the cats inside then and we will buy some traps when we go out.’

‘Uh huh.’

Bear in mind I was trying to wash my hair while we had this conversation.

Little did we know that mice were going to be the least of our worries. Heh.

Soon after I got out of the shower, we had a good look at where the mouse had disappeared.

Nathan pulled back the lino in the dining room and peered into the mouse swallowing gap. Nothing. He pulled back the lino further and discovered! a board. Not just any board though, it was a board covering A HOLE. In my floor. Where someone had put their foot through the floorboards and never bothered to patch it up.

Wait though, it gets better.

Guess what we found in the hole? Go on, guess.

Water!

So you know, when Mum said that walking through my house (with it’s slightly uneven floors) was like being at sea, she wasn’t far wrong.

Thanks Mum.

Sooooooo, after my parents showed up (Mum armed with a container of tadpoles, just in case we couldn’t fix it), we set to work pulling up part of the floor and digging a drain to let the water out.

It was muddy and messy and did I mention the mud?

Oh god, the mud.

The water turned out to be grey water that was flooding back under the house because the drain was built by a fucking moron built exactly level with the house and EVERYONE knows that water won’t run up hill.

You know, this might explains the slightly musty smell that we couldn’t get rid of.

Heh.

I did suggest to Nathan that we just pull the entire floor out, plant reeds, let some frogs go and call it an ‘Indoor Outdoor’ area. I really wanted to watch frogs while sitting inside.

Sniff.

(I may very possibly be more my mothers daughter than I think.)

But anyway, we dug a drain and let the water out. The really muddy part came when the drain filled up and had to be emptied with buckets, so that MORE water could come out.

And then more water.

Is it bad that I could carry on a conversation with Nathan and Dad while I was outside and they were inside? I have to growl at Dad publicly for throwing bits of rubble through the hole at me.

Thanks Dad.

So I have come to the conclusion that whoever built the house was an idiot, because honestly, who digs a house shaped hole, lays flagstones (Yes, I said FLAGSTONES, not concrete or footings) and then puts a house exactly level with the yard.

I mean, honestly?!

This is AFTER I rinsed my hands. Thank god I don’t keep my fingernails long.

And mud is good for the skin, right?

Anyway, we now need to concrete the entire dining room, very soon. You know, before the floor collapses from dry rot and we drown.

The aftermath outside. See? An inside pond with reeds and frogs wouldn’t be such a bad thing after all.

At least until I discovered frogs in my socks.

Maybe I should be breeding trout instead.

Myst April 7, 2008 at 11:01 pm

Oh dear.

Looks messy and expensive….not good at all…

….bugger.

G
xx

Myst’s last blog post..Happy Anniversary!

witchypoo April 8, 2008 at 12:01 am

There’s a headache for you. What about the timber supporting the floor? Is that sound?

witchypoo’s last blog post..The Apple of My Eye

Jill S. April 8, 2008 at 1:40 am

Oh no! But you did look very pretty with the mud on your face, so there’s that.

Jill S.’s last blog post..What’s on your nightstand?

Memarie Lane April 8, 2008 at 2:10 am

I’m so glad I rent.

Memarie Lane’s last blog post..Six Steps to a Sexy Bedroom

Suzie April 8, 2008 at 2:25 am

I my goodness I thought you were gonna say you found a body under the floor.

Suzie’s last blog post..Crisco and Flop Sweat

Burgh Baby's Mom April 8, 2008 at 2:58 am

Um, yeah. I got nothing. Yeah, uh, that sucks!?!? So glad our house is built at the top of a hill.

Oh, and you look pretty hot with mud on your face. That’s good news, right?

Burgh Baby’s Mom’s last blog post..A History Lesson with a Twist

Lou April 8, 2008 at 3:36 am

What is ‘grey water’?

Lou’s last blog post..busy, busy, busy

Xbox4NappyRash April 8, 2008 at 5:27 am

I would LOVE to have had a go in all that.

doing what exactly I’m not so sure…

Xbox4NappyRash’s last blog post..Not bad for €10 an hour

Marylin April 8, 2008 at 7:29 am

wow… that sucks, I mean REALLY sucks! Think you could wangle any money out of the previous owners for not owning up to these probs before the sale?

Marylin’s last blog post..Weekly Winners #15

Anja April 8, 2008 at 8:25 am

Gebus Wheezus, Suzie and I think alike. I was so expecting a body.

Oh honey, it’s one thing after another, isn’t it? You need a holiday, or a weekend away – full of frivolity and fuc.. fun.

Failing that; kill the previous owners.

Anja’s last blog post..Screw up Tuesday.

Tanya April 8, 2008 at 9:21 am

oh noooo!!!!!!

Taz April 8, 2008 at 9:41 am

wow..

that builder seems to be a bit of dummy..

good luck with the flooring hun..

hope it goes all ok for you..

Taz’s last blog post..24 weeks old

frogpondsrock April 8, 2008 at 11:17 am

hehehehe Great post sweety.. and Daddy says he wasn’t throwing rubble at you. Your hands were just in the way..

I still have plenty of Tadpoles here…

xxx mum xxx

frogpondsrock’s last blog post..Chaos Central… Oooops

Ree April 8, 2008 at 11:37 am

A swimming pool! In your dining room!

Ree’s last blog post..The Sweatshop?

janethesane April 8, 2008 at 2:34 pm

Oh man. I would’ve given the frog pond serious thought. Awful that you have to clean up such a mess.

janethesane’s last blog post..Blogging and Privacy

Leslie April 8, 2008 at 2:38 pm

Oh no! What a mess!

It wasn’t that long ago that you bought the house. I really wonder if the previous owner could held liable for not disclosing something like that? It seems unlikely that they didn’t know the problem was there.

I hope you’re able to get everything fixed quickly and easily.

Leslie’s last blog post..For Those About To Pretend To Rock, I Salute You

Kat April 8, 2008 at 6:20 pm

I like frogs. =)

Kat’s last blog post..Friends.

river April 8, 2008 at 7:24 pm

When you said guess what we found my first thought was termites, now I’m worried that maybe the problem drain extends right under the entire house. That would be a very expensive repair job. Maybe you could dig away the dirt from around the house so that you create a slope? Then your house would be on a little hill and the moisture would drain away and dry out, leaving the way clearer for under house repairs.

Jenty April 8, 2008 at 9:40 pm

Oi, that sounds really expensive to fix!!!

Jenty’s last blog post..Weekly Winner #13

gareth April 8, 2008 at 11:06 pm

OMG..

do you have some comeback with the inspection people ??!!

praying for dry weather for you !!

Angela April 9, 2008 at 2:19 am

Oh, dear! What a huge, ugly mess! And mice on top of that?! We have a little rat family living in our attic right now and it drives me mad at night.

Here’s hoping everything gets fixed up soon for ya.

Angela’s last blog post..Nice!

Hyphen Mama April 9, 2008 at 11:53 am

I just kept saying OH MY GOD… the whole time I was reading this. But really… it’s fixable, right? We’ve run into some crazy shiz when we’ve been doing fix ups at our house, but nothing that compares to THAT. You really win the prize.

Hyphen Mama’s last blog post..Some People Are Just Oblivious

tiff April 9, 2008 at 4:39 pm

Ugh, mice and water!

tiff’s last blog post..Doormats and bloodwork and whiskers on kittens.

imaginary binky April 12, 2008 at 9:04 am

Sincerely, you should consider a fish farm. Fish farming is all the rage. All the kids are doing it.

imaginary binky’s last blog post..Get your sex toy away from my child

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