Animals

I really don’t feel guilty about this at all

by Veronica on February 3, 2012

in Animals,Garden

We were in the garden the other day when Amy spotted two snails having sex.

“Mummy, what are the snails doing?”

“They’re making babies.”

“How do snails have babies?”

“They lay eggs.”

“Oh. And then the babies will hatch and eat our plants?”

“Probably.”

Five minutes later, the snails were slowly going their separate ways (they must have been at it all night to be done so quickly) and the ducks were at the gate looking hungry.

So I picked the snails up and threw them to the ducks.

I’m pretty sure they died happy, if we ignore the moments of terror when first they flew, (snails are not designed for flight, by the way) and then were eaten by hungry ducks.

This means war.

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Why I’ve resolved to stop thinking so much

by Veronica on January 4, 2012

in Animals

It was 1.30am and I wasn’t sleeping. The heat in the house was stifling and opening the windows only helped a little.

I got out of bed and stood, looking at the streetlight and the myriad moths battering themselves to death against it. Sometimes, the bats will hunt under the streetlight and I will stand, watching, entranced for long minutes.

Last night there were no bats, but the breeze had cooled down and it was pleasant, standing there.

I was busy contemplating everything; the growing blob inside me; plans for the morning; ways to make sure we didn’t run out of chocolate.

Deep in thought I didn’t notice the cat, as she wrapped herself around my ankle and, suddenly, viciously bit me on the toe, kicking her back legs against me for better leverage.

I can only say that thinking is dangerous and you should not do it.

Especially near cats.

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I got attacked by an angry duck to bring you this post. I hope you’re happy.

by Veronica on December 4, 2011

in Animals,Garden

It is the fourth day of Summer today and when I went outside to take photos of my ducklings for you Internet, I put on thick socks, jeans, an undershirt, a t-shirt, a jumper, Nathan’s big furry coat and red gumboots. It’s cold Internet and the cold has sunk into my bones, leaving me wanting nothing more than to curl up with my book and unending cups of tea.

These are the sacrifices I make, in order to bring you ducklings photos. Of which there is only one, because while the ducklings regarded me suspiciously and hid behind their mother, the mother had no such qualms and instead seemed interested in eating my face.

For an animal that doesn’t have teeth and can’t really use it’s claws, mother ducks are rather vicious and attacky.

You’re welcome.

So, after wandering around after the ducklings and finding one dead (it got confused about which duck was its mother last night and despite my best attempts to shoo it back to its siblings, spent a cold night without its mum), I went into the garden.

We’re not telling the children that I know where the strawberries are ripening.

Blackcurrants ripening on my black currant bush. My two grandmothers gave me this cutting from my great grandmothers blackcurrant bush when I first moved in here. I’m glad that it’s not only survived, but thrived.

These are the sweet williams that I used to make my “aisle” for the wedding. I still haven’t planted them out, but you know. I’ll get there. Just as soon as I can make Nathan dig the holes for me.

It seems that miscarriages and exhaustion make bendy joints even worse and if walking has been displacing joints, I shudder to think what trying to dig a hole would do. At this stage, I’m just grateful for thigh high socks, which are not only keeping me warm, but are providing valuable knee support.

My children “helped” me plant peas again this year, which has seen little pea plants pop up everywhere. This one I found almost in the pathway, along with some self sown chives and a large amount of grass.

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These are intolerable working conditions.

by Veronica on November 3, 2011

in Animals,Gotta Laugh

[Video: Now with captions]

Internet, I give you the baby birds that are screeching above my desk. BECAUSE I WANT YOU TO SUFFER WITH ME.

These working conditions are intolerable. I’ve tried complaining to the groundskeeper and maintenance man (Nathan) but he tells me his hands are tied and I need to discuss the issue with pest control (The Cats).

Either way, nothing is getting done and my ears are hurting.

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Our wedding, sick children and eggs. Lots of eggs.

by Veronica on August 24, 2011

in Animals,I'm getting married

I awoke at 3am to Amy, staring at me.

“Mummmmmy, my ear hurts.”

She coughed a little for good measure, as I stumbled out of bed and towards the fridge for panadol. This is why I buy panadol when my children are awfully healthy – it’s because I don’t want to be short of it at 3am.

I dosed her up, tucked her back into bed and fell back asleep myself, praying that she wasn’t really getting sick, as the things I had planned for today really didn’t require two children in attendance.

When my alarm went off and I stopped pressing snooze repeatedly, I woke Amy up.

And then I woke her up again five minutes later.

And then again, 10 minutes later.

“But mummy, my bones are really very tired today.”

I was still hopeful that I would be able to send her to school, up until she dozed off during breakfast, before coughing herself awake again.It appeared she was actually, unfortunately, ill.

Instead of school, that would have been a lovely break for me and fun for her, she got to come to see our Celebrant with us, while Nathan and I dealt with the legal stuff that we needed to get married.

Both children were very well behaved, in the scheme of things and I was quite pleased. We’re now all official with our legal intentions to marry and birth certificates looked at and everything. That is exciting.

26th of November, we’re getting married.

***

In other news, which is unrelated to everything else, I collected 14 eggs today. FOURTEEN. Even though I am using eggs as fast as I can, I am not using eggs as fast as my chooks are popping them out.

I’ve asked Nathan nicely (demanded) to make me a sign to put out the front, offering eggs for sale, but he is terribly busy with other things (slacking off) and hasn’t. Yet.

All of this is to say, if you’re in Tasmania, in the Hobart ish area and would like to buy some proper free range eggs, then I’m your girl.

When I say proper free range, I mean, my chooks have access to an acre of pasture that is mine 24/7 and they frequently roam the 10 acres of pasture that surrounds me. They are proper free range and the eggs are delicious.

I also have duck eggs to sell, but supply of these is not as reliable as the chook eggs, so email me first.

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