I appear to have broken my filter

by Veronica on November 17, 2012

in Blogging

I spotted the Fake Mamamia hashtag on twitter this morning and wasn’t going to get involved. That is, until I saw a real MM article about some lady who got an all expenses paid trip to Tasmania – a place she thought that she hated, and bagged out plenty. But apparently in this day and age, an all expenses paid trip wins, even if you think you’ll hate the location.

She went on to be ASTOUNDED and AMAZED that she actually (wait for it) ENJOYED HERSELF.

Shock. Horror.

I was offended and said so on twitter.

Then I looked at the #FakeMamamia hashtags and I couldn’t help it anymore, I joined in, because come on, that site SO had it coming. Click baiting headlines, setting women up against each other, hating on people for making different choices, you could argue that Mamamia is all that’s wrong with women’s media at the moment.

It was HILARIOUS. I haven’t had that much fun on twitter in a very long time.






There were hundreds of fake headlines. It was fantastic.

As I tweeted though, enjoying every single minute of mocking that I did, I realised something: I’ve broken my filter.

I’ve spent the last 17 days writing fiction for NaNoWriMo. I’ve removed the ads from here. I’ve turned down all the sponsored posts I’ve been offered. I (mostly) stopped checking my traffic. I stopped caring.

And I haven’t regretted a single moment of it. I wasn’t tweeting this morning worrying about what people thought of me. I wasn’t crippled by angst over the unfollows I got (and trust me, I checked, I got plenty of those), or about whether I was annoying anyone.

I was having fun, saying exactly what I wanted to say. I didn’t even freak out when my tweet ended up on the SMH [who, incidentally, completely missed the satire of the whole thing, and seemed to think that one single tweet had “caused” it, rather than a buildup over god knows how long] and then syndicated through a bunch of other news sites. Eh, it could have been worse.

Fiction writing has broken my filter*. And it’s awesome.

*I should clarify that when I say my filter, I mean the filter of “oh noes, what will people THINK OF ME” filter. Not that handy one that stops me oversharing about my vagina, or telling hilariously embarassing tales about my 6yo. Also, when I talk amout MM, obviously I am grmbling about the site in general, not about the woman who runs it. No personal attacks occured during my hilarity. Calm down.


Jessiebean AKA Thrifty Mama November 17, 2012 at 2:13 pm

I had fun too and actually gained 8 followers!

Becky November 17, 2012 at 2:15 pm

“Fiction writing has broken my filter*. And it’s awesome.”

I seriously want to stand up and CHEER for you, and I’m not exaggerating.

Rusty Hoe November 17, 2012 at 2:21 pm

I must admit I have been laughing my arse off reading the feed. So much that needed to be said finally out there with just the right amount of snark. Will be interesting to see how mainstream media read it (I haven’t seen the SMH article yet) though given their usual take on SM I’m guessing they’ll miss the point entirely.

Veronica November 17, 2012 at 2:35 pm

I updated to include the link to the SMH, who entirely missed the point of what it was all about, but here you go. http://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/life/lady-parts-tweet-sparks-mia-freedman-backlash-20121117-29igd.html

Rusty Hoe November 17, 2012 at 7:49 pm

Thanks 🙂

Sharon A. November 17, 2012 at 2:46 pm

I missed all the action, but have read about it today. I thought it was funny.

Denyse November 17, 2012 at 3:14 pm

The best part of this whole thing? You! You’ve got something to have fun with. Life’s been so shatteringly awful since little E’s birth… And I’ve missed YOU! Go for it. Fun is the best thing ever! Xxx

Sarah @fignutmum November 17, 2012 at 4:57 pm

It was fun wasn’t it.

Alison November 17, 2012 at 5:19 pm

At 44 I think I am just too old to give shit one any more what people think of me. Though I was never all that good at it, but age has increased my propensity for behaviour that gets me banned, blocked and unfollowed. Bit disappointed that I was only unfollowed three times this week on twitter and not blocked once!

Look, if I like someone I will make some effort not to deliberately offend them, but frankly if they find me offensive it’s not a good fit anyway and there’s a whole universe of folk out there to choose from. I don’t get the strange notion some people have that their choice to take offense at me should matter to me at all. Overall age plus some excellent Cognitive Behavioural Therapy disengaged what few filters I had left. Come to the dark side. Once you realise and really start to believe that other people’s disapproval just Does. Not. Matter. it’s liberating 😀

It’s very good to see you feeling a little lighthearted too.

frogpondsrock November 18, 2012 at 6:07 am

I have been telling her this for a while now Alison. The people who matter, don’t mind and the people who mind DON’T FUCKING MATTER, or words to that affect .

Alison November 18, 2012 at 6:41 am

Wise words from her wise mum. I love seeing the obvious support and love and friendship you two have for one other. It makes me happy 🙂

river November 17, 2012 at 7:59 pm

Aha! You’ve discovered freedom. Who cares what people think? You’re not personally insulting anyone, just having fun.

Mrs Woog November 17, 2012 at 9:35 pm

Your tweets were the perfect blend of fun and fairness. Love that you are free! Keep going xx

Cazz November 17, 2012 at 10:22 pm

Darling Veronica, I found your blog today through the #fakemamamia.

For the first time ever I wish I had a twitter account. Its the weirdest, most hypocritical, sanctimonious site and it was doing my head in. I thought I was alone in thinking what a strange place it is. Anyway, it’s about time it was called out and because it was you’ve got another person sending prayers for you, your baby girl and lovely family xx

Amie November 18, 2012 at 8:11 am

I’m not on twitter but that is just hilarious! I love your blog, I love your amazing strength and how you somehow manage to retain your awesomely wicked sense of humour through everything that gets thrown at you – you’re an absolute inspiration to me and all real women out there – I’m nearly double your age but if only I had half your wisdom…

love and light to you and your family xx

Vanessa @ babblingbandit.me November 18, 2012 at 10:16 am

Loved following that hashtag yesterday. I’ve never liked the MM website but I followed for the hilarity of the tweets. Some ppl on twitter were getting so sensitive about a bit of playful satire though. People are so sensitive these days!

Paula November 19, 2012 at 9:18 am

I was directed to the hashtag by a male friend of mine. LOVED it! Some of the headlines weren’t far off “real” MamaMia articles either! Best fun since #ActivatedAlmonds 🙂

Mandy November 19, 2012 at 12:51 pm

Like Cazz above, I also found your website while wondering ‘this fakemamamia stuff sounds cool’ and googling it.

Now you have broken MY filter young lady. I’ve started numerous blogs but that bloody filter….Anyway, as you can see I’ve included my blog address and that’s the first time (and I started me first blog in 2007) I’ve put it out there… The main reason I’ve never done it before is because I’m worried what people will think of me. Ridiculous.

Thank you for being so inspiring, you’ve got another reader in me 🙂

Now for Mamamia. Cazz said it in a word. That site is weird. I’ve always had a guilty pleasure in reading trashy mags and Mamamia is that in spades. So it’s kind of like I have a love/hate relationship with that site…Actually that’s way too strong, it’s definitely like/hate. It’s become increasingly annoying with the ‘whole dinner party’ rules which have been doing my head in. The absolute hypocrisy of this rule was the recent ‘article’ about Melissa George which basically talked about how up herself she was. Of course, this unleashed some* bitchy remarks agreeing with the sentiment…I’m a bit embarrassed to say that this included one from me. It was after I sent it off into the ether that I realised I didn’t didn’t give a flying fart if Melissa George was up herself or not. I also realised (and felt annoyed) by the feeling that I’d been played. It’s good to know I’m not the only one who is bamboozled by a site that says they don’t want judgemental, rude or snarky comments but then get you all riled up with their one sided ‘articles’….

*I was going to say ‘heaps of remarks’ here but I don’t think there were more than 30 comments. Has anyone else noticed that the comments on Mamamia have reduced from the hundreds to tens?

Veronica November 19, 2012 at 1:25 pm

Hello and welcome! Leave your filter at the door, I promise I won’t judge you if you don’t judge me. Seriously though, I think we all panic about the same things and worry about how we’re perceived. It’s scary to think how stifled I get just because I’m scared of what someone ELSE will think of me. I’m my own worst critic. Sigh.

Mandy November 19, 2012 at 12:53 pm

Ok, maybe it’s great I’ve lost my who-cares-what-anyone-else-thinks filter but I should be paying closer attention to my grammar and spelling one!

jeanie November 20, 2012 at 5:23 pm

There I was thinking I was suffering from procrastination, but it may well be a filter issue. Thanks for the heads up!!

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