Kidspot’s Top 50 – Blog your way to Dunk Island.

by Veronica on August 18, 2010

in Amy, Blogging, Cancer, Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, Grief, Headfuck

I’ve not had a major holiday in a long time. Never since I’ve been with Nathan and certainly not since our children came along. In fact, the thought of a holiday, while sending me giddy with excitement, also freaks me out a little bit because wow, have you met my daughter? She’s a bit challenging. So we’ve never had a family holiday, which is a shame. I’m sure we’re missing out on something.

The last holiday I had, I was 13. I saved up for my plane fares and I went to Adelaide with my grandmother for Easter, and she was, obviously, still alive then. We had a brilliant time working out bus routes into the city and shopping and exploring Adelaide. Oh my word, the shopping. That woman was fun to shop with. We ate sushi for the first time (we were hooked) and it was a blast.

But you know, I was 13 and my Nan wasn’t dead, so I may have my rose coloured glasses on a little here.

Anyway, I was named one of Kidspot’s Top 50 Mummy Bloggers, which is kind of a big deal for me. The sponsors love us apparently and want to send one of the top 50 mummy bloggers to stay in tropical paradise for a week. Which is my ideal holiday, imagine how well my joints would do if thrown into warmth? And not Tassie Pseudo Warmth, but actual real warmth? I digress.

On the flip side, I am up there alongside some amazing women, who desperately deserve a holiday of their own. Tiff for instance, my amazing friend, who has spent more time in hospital with Ivy these last few months than anyone should ever have to.

My last 18 months has been a bit of a nightmare. Cancer diagnoses, hospitalisations, Nan dying, anxiety attacks, more hospitalisations, geneticists, Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, a coeliacs diagnosis, Paed appointment after Paed appointment, broken arms and finally, early intervention and the beginnings of a diagnosis that is looking likely to end up as Aspergers for Amy. Yes, I finally said it out loud here, despite not wanting to jinx myself. We think Amy has Aspergers. There is a lot going on with Amy that I’ve not even been able to bring myself to blog about, because how do you tell the InterWebs that your daughter is amazingly talented, but oh my God, I think something is not entirely right here.

I would love a holiday and you can actually vote for me over there. You can also click through and have a look at my three favourite posts and what I’ve got to say for myself.

By the same token, I am absolutely thrilled to have ended up as a top 50 blogger. I’ve been doing this for a very long time now and it’s nice to have someone say that they enjoy reading here. Every email I get, every new commenter who says ‘I get where you’re coming from’ makes me happy.

And sometimes, being happy with what you’ve got is enough, no matter how long ago the last holiday was.

***

Have you been on holiday with your family recently? Where did you go? Where would your dream destination be if you had unlimited funds? (Unlimited funds would send me straight to England to visit my very favourite bloggers over there, before a quick trip to Kansas and then home again.)

I’m half hoping that this summer, we can go and spend a few days on a beach up at St Helens with the kids because that would be lovely and relaxing. Failing that, a day trip to the beach would be nice. Or anywhere I can keep the kids semi contained while I lay in the sun with a book and my sunscreen. Like the backyard. Maybe here, in the depths of winter, I’m just longing for sunshine and warmth. A very real possibility.

Anne August 18, 2010 at 6:22 am

A new reader just delurking to say I love your blog, and I voted for you- you definitely deserve a vacation!!!
I’m emailing you an invite to check out my “mommy blog” if you’d like. By the way, I can totally relate to your previous post about bedtime- it’s a nightmare here with my 3 year old daughter as well…:)

Anne

rachael August 18, 2010 at 6:53 am

I’ve not been on a real holiday since I was living with my folks. Been to see family. Traveled for work, but not a holiday in um well 20 years. Aspergers is hard, but early intervention is key. I’ll run over and click about now.

Michelle August 18, 2010 at 6:58 am

I’ll be voting. You re definately a top 50 blogger! Just fab. We went away to the coast for a week recently, no where glam but it was great and we really enjoyed ourselves. Mich x

Tracey August 18, 2010 at 7:18 am

Hi Veronica

Saying things out loud, particularly things you don’t want to say (or want others to hear) is really, really hard. Well done to you!

Re: the holiday. We had actually booked to go to QLD in October and then freaked out and cancelled because it all seemed too hard and now we are going to Devonport for a week at Christmas time instead!! Not quite in the same league!! One day, we will have great holidays and the kids will run off and play and just check back in at lunch and dinner!!

As I have said before, I would love to see you, Amy and Isaac again soon. Does not have to be a Tuesday, weekends are good too. Just let me know if you can do or we could meet at a park half way.

Tracey x

Marylin August 18, 2010 at 7:23 am

Voted, of course!
Ohh how I would love a holiday. Without the kids. Ahh that would be blissful wouldn’t it!

tiff August 18, 2010 at 8:00 am

I’d love to see you win.

The last holiday we went on ended in disaster.
Hospital for two weeks.

My dream destination?

For me; fiji
For the littlest girl: Disneyland, to meet the princesses.

Fiona August 18, 2010 at 10:09 am

Keep it hush hush, but I just bought a gift voucher for Rish for his birthday for a romantic escape :) shhhh

Jayne August 18, 2010 at 10:26 am

(((hugs))) Hope you get to your tropical holiday, it would be lovely for you and you obviously need it xxx

Watershedd August 18, 2010 at 10:33 am

Voted.

As you know, I have an autistic nephew and had another child in my life many years ago who was apparently Asperger’s. It’s an issue close to my heart – up there with Indigenous human rights (has to be living with an advocate!). The main difference for me, is that I do not live with the challenges of my brother’s family on a daily basis. The EI people will guide you but I also know you will dig for yourself. ASPECT (Autism Spectrum Australia) has a blog and forums that may offer insight. And even though I’m not a Mummy, I love reading your blog!

Trish August 18, 2010 at 1:23 pm

Goodluck , it sounds like you need a holiday as much as our dear Tiff. Hope things with Amy get sorted out .

river August 18, 2010 at 3:41 pm

Unlimited funds would see me in Ireland for a year, then Canada for a year, then a few weeks in Jamaica on my way home.

I’ll be going back to vote for you now.

Veronica August 18, 2010 at 7:59 pm

Anne – Thankyou! Your daughter is gorgeous BTW.

Rachael – It all comes down to $$$ really doesn’t it. We’ve never got any spare money, so we don’t holiday. Thanks, she has been challenging lately and we’re hoping EI give us some more keys to working with her.

Michelle – Thankyou! Oooh, a week at the coast sounds lovely too. Maybe I ought to do that once winter ends.

Tracey – Not quite in the same league at all! We will have to try and catch up once winter ends and I lose my can’t be botheredness.

Marylin – Thankyou honey! And yes, blissful.

Tiff – I’d love to see you win though! Funny how it works.

Fiona – Oooooh! I hope you have a blast!

Jayne – It’s very unlikely I would win, but I think a holiday this summer is much needed. Even if we only go camping.

Watershedd – It always makes me happy when someone who isn’t a mother still loves reading here. Thankyou.

Trish – Me too, I’m hoping EI can give us some answers.

River – Now Ireland, I wouldn’t mind visiting there!

Angela August 18, 2010 at 11:21 pm

There you are, another vote. Good Luck xxxx

Arienette August 19, 2010 at 6:09 am

Our lst ‘holiday’ was a month in northern Queensland visiting my parents. Yes, we DID travel from England to QLD (6 flights round trip) with a 9 week old baby. Yes, we ARE certifiably insane. But we didn’t pay for that. My parents stumped up for flights, we just brought spending money.

If I had unlimited funds….. I dont know what I’d do. A cruise, probably, because I’ve always REALLY wanted to go on a cruise. I find the idea fascinating. Otherwise maybe a trip to some remote sandy beachy island. Sun, sea, and cocktails, yes please! OR a trip to somewhere exciting in America…Vegas! Or New York. Coming from London, I shouldn’t have city-envy, but I do. London is beautiful and if it wasn’t ridiculously expensive I’d live here forever and ever, but it’s an old city, there’s very little space in the city-city (different from the outer-city which is expanding constantly) for new things. I find the idea of a city that is still in it’s infancy amazingly exciting.

Becky August 19, 2010 at 6:32 am

Hey V—

I dated a guy for almost 3 year who had Asperger’s. Brilliant— Lord, he was brilliant. And under it all, he was sweet— but he stepped on feelings because he couldn’t read people’s body languages/expressions at ALL. The ability to understand how people worked, or even why, was just beyond him, and it resulted in a lot of strange situations. He was also a little obsessed with scent— he once smelled a cologne he liked so much that he shut down for about 1/2 an hour. It was really different.

I know Asperger’s presents in several different ways and even severity, and I don’t know why I’m telling you this, except…. well, if it DOES happen to be the “A” word, then it’s hard on you guys, but it doesn’t mean that Amy’s not going to grow up and live a normal, happy life. You guys might have to work harder at it than a normal parent, but it’s totally possible. I know the thing that saved my ex was because of his brilliance his parents were able to get him into a “gifted” program. If he’d been stuck in everyday school during grammar school, he might have been shunted into a different department altogether, if you know what I mean.

(PS: One of the things that really helped us out was that the ex was willing to learn— we actually used to sit down and discuss various postures and what they meant like we were talking about a computer program. For example, crossed arms, eyes shifting away, tightly closed mouth= he’d done something that made someone uncomfortable, and he needed to back off, etc, etc. He didn’t get it, but he did understand it but he was able to memorize it, as if it were a mathematical or chemical equation and learn to fake appropriate responses. I don’t know if Amy has problems reading other’s body languages, but you maybe could make a memory game of it, or something, when she’s older ?)

PS: I heartily, heartily, HEARTILY recommend you pick up The Speed of Dark by Elizabeth Moon.

Other Fiona August 19, 2010 at 3:03 pm

Hi V,

I thought that was a lovely comment by Becky up above.

I hope I am not sticking my foot in unwanted, but again I have to put forward my plea for parents generally not to rush into diagnosis. I’m sure that having a hypothesis is great (and a courageous move) and if it helps with management strategies, go for it. It could be possible to ‘act as if’ in terms of management but not to agree to assessment for a formal diagnosis till a later age.

So much can happen developmentally between the age of 4-7. I know one family who had a child diagnosed as ‘autistic’ at 4 (not Aspergers) and that diagnosis was over-turned at the age of 6. It is possible to continue Early Intervention but not have assessment for a ‘diagnosis’ till a child has had more time to mature and develop. As an ex-teacher, I believe there is much over-diagnosis happening in our community with very young children.

I am also concerned with the possibility of mis-diagnosis when kids are assessed at ages as young as 4. That is just so young. There’s a lot of diagnostic criteria overlap with things like ADHD/Giftedness or Aspergers/Giftedness or some of these ‘conditions’ can be co-existing.

I will definitely be voting for you to have a holiday, you so much deserve it. You’re a strong person: keep staying strong, and take it hour by hour (or minute by minute on occasion!) xoxoxoxoxoxol

Issac August 24, 2010 at 11:25 pm

AAAAYYYYY!!! Ive been to dunk island!!! It’s in an area of Queensland. Don’t go there, ever Since Cyclone larry {aGeS AgO bTw}, the place is a hole. Dont waste your time or money. I went there and can not say anything good about it anymore. And if the weather’s bad, you can forget your holiday . . . truly forget it all!
Planning to take Amy? How about the little one, Issac (is it)

Issac August 24, 2010 at 11:32 pm

I’ve got the perfect destination for Isaac when he becomes my age: LYNX LODGE
Check it out at http://www.news.com.au/travel/news/models-massages-and-mud-wrestling-at-resort/story-e6frfq80-1225907669732

TRIP OF A LIFETIME!!!!

Amy August 25, 2010 at 2:58 pm

Issac, why don’t YOU go there first and then YOU can tell us what a waste of time and money it was. You’re probably the sort that could use some use!

I yearn for the tropics! Never been up northern Aus in all my life.

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