There are things you don’t want to hear when you go to the doctor.
Like – You have the back of a 60 year old. When Nathan is only 28.
His back is bad. Really bad.
There are arthritic changes, a bulging disc, some compressed discs, bone spurs, narrowing of the nerve canals and degenerative issues.
Never gonna get better kind of bad.
Sure, loads of physio should help in the short term, but as far as I remember, nothing can be done for bones that are arthritic, or bones that are breaking down.
***
I’ve been seeing a Gyno for my insane periods and heavy bleeding/cramps like labour pains. That’s the backstory.
I went to see them yesterday, to follow up on how the trial of a contraceptive pill went.
[paraphrasing, as best I can, because somehow, telling you without the conversation added is too hard]
‘So, how did the pill go?’
‘HA! Badly. Really badly. I came off it early because it was bad.’
‘Bad how?’
‘Mood swings, depression, increased dislocations, etc etc. Bad.’
‘Well, in situations like yours, we really like to try the contraceptive pill.’
‘Yes, but the pill doesn’t agree with me.’
‘I can see. And you seem very against trying it again.’
‘Yes.’
‘So, we’d like to try the Mirena.’
‘No.’
‘Huh? No?’
‘I have anecdotal evidence to tell me that the mirena would be really bad for me’ [he tries to cut in] ‘and YES, I KNOW that the progesterone supposedly doesn’t leave your uterus, but really, my body is so sensitive to progesterone that I don’t want to trial the mirena.’
[he looks very spluttery]
‘We would like to try the mirena. If you don’t want the mirena, then we’re looking at things like gonadatropins and they’ll make you gain lots of facial hair and will deepen your voice and -‘
‘Well I don’t want to trial those either.’
‘If you’d try the Mirena, we wouldn’t have to look at gonadatropins.’
‘I don’t want the Mirena.’
‘Gonadatropins will make you gain a lot of weight… wait, I’m going to consult with my boss.‘
[A few minutes later, his boss- the doctor I saw last time enters.]
‘Hi Veronica, so you trialled the pill?’
‘Yes. And it was awful. I stopped it after 3 weeks because I couldn’t cope anymore.’
‘What happened?’
‘My joints fell apart, it felt like I was walking on a wobble board instead of a pelvis, I was angry and sad and it was horrible. So I stopped.’
‘Good, that’s what we discussed. So really, our next option is the Mirena.’
‘I don’t want the Mirena.’
‘It’s really the best option.’
‘I don’t believe it’s the best option for ME. I think it will make my joints worse and YES I KNOW the progesterone won’t leave my uterus, yada yada, I’m not willing to put a coil into my uterus to just see.’
‘We’re really running out of options here, the Mirena…’
‘No. I am opposed to IUD’s on ethical grounds too and really, I don’t think poking my internal organs with metal and making them angry is going to make me feel better on the whole.’
‘Ethical grounds?’
‘Yes. I don’t like how they work.’
‘Do you KNOW how they work?’
‘I know a plain IUD doesn’t prevent ovulation or conception, it just prevents implantation. I know the Mirena with it’s progesterone generally prevents ovulation, and also that it prevents implantation in the event that conception occurs. I don’t want the Mirena, I don’t want something I can’t stop using myself if I get bad. I can’t afford to wait weeks until I can get in here to be seen and fixed and HONESTLY, I’ve been on the wrong side of side effects and statistics for so long, I’m not prepared to mess around with things.’
‘Right. Well then.’
‘Can we try something to help with the cramps and pain instead of trying the mirena? ‘
At this point, I feel like I’ve been fighting the doctors to get ANY sort of health care that doesn’t involve inserting a foreign body into my uterus and leaving it there. Not to mention the absolute shock on their faces that I wouldn’t accept the Mirena as ‘the best possible thing’ [all hail the fucking copper coil] and wouldn’t be badgered into it. Not even with the ‘you’re gonna grow facial hair and get really fat’ scare tactics that the original doctor was using. I mean, fuck.
Eventually, the doctors agree on a course of action, medication wise and send me away with a script.
45 minutes later, I get to read all about the reasons I should not take a drug to help my blood clot.
Like, don’t take the drug if anyone in your immediate family has had a blood clot. Both Mum and Nan have had blood clots.
Don’t take the drug if you have bruising, especially bruising without trauma. Hello fucking EHLERS DANLOS.
Don’t take the drug if you have irregular periods. Um yeah, that’s part of why I’m seeing a Gyno. I’m 21, I’ve had periods since I was 12 and I’ve had 2 kids, my periods should be fucking regular. They aren’t.
I’m just so tired of having to fight the doctors for things that might help. Tired of them not asking questions they should before they prescribe something. Tired of being treated like a disobedient child, for not falling into line and letting them do whatever ‘they think best’.
Tired of feeling like these bandaid fixes don’t do anything towards working out why my body isn’t doing regular periods, why I bleed for 10-12 days each period, why the periods feel like labour pains, and why I’m having hot flushes.
Tired.
I’m booking an appointment with my regular GP to discuss the new tablets before I even think about taking them. Somehow, knowing how my body works and which side of the stats I fall on, I’m a little concerned about taking something to promote blood clotting.
On the upside, there was a Med Student there during the whole appointment and I got ages to talk to her about Ehlers Danlos while the doctors were consulting in the other room. She was lovely and interested to know how EDS presents in normal cases.
So good deed done. Even if I still want to bang my head against the wall.
Ugh. Bigs hugs to yourself and Nathan.
My husband has a fucked back after spending his childhood and teenage years helping out in the family furniture removal business. We have to be super careful with it – which is why I ended up forking out lots of $s to lovely handmen to do things like clean our gutters (which happened yesterday). Have to be so careful with backs.
The Mirena thing does my head in because the Ob&Gyn tried to insist I must have one. My choices were Mirena or complete hysterectomy. I walked out choosing neither. Luckily for me that has at this stage not been a serious issue but honest to goodness there has to be somewhere in between.
Those were basically my options too, except they will not do a hysterectomy on a 21 year old. I think I’ll seriously push for one once I’m decided that I’m done with kids completely.
Oh MATE. I am so sorry, really. Doctors can be such arseholes when it comes to women and our bodies. I wish you could come up here and be seen at my local womens health centre. They actually really listen and GIVE a shit.
Good luck with it all, thinking of you XO
They really can be can’t they? Just for once, I think I’d like a decent experience with a doctor. Just once.
What. The. F***.
Why is it so inconceivable that they wouldn’t understand you not liking the way anti-implantation contraceptive devices work? It’s not like you were pushing your viewpoint on them– you were just explaining why you had a problem with it. Heck, you didn’t even go into any religious or ethical reasons. You were actually stating cold, hard, medical facts. Why is it so stinking confusing to them that you might have done a little research on your own and actually know more about your body and your reactions than they can? Crap. (Sorry for the rant, but I went through the same thing when the doc tried to put me on the birth control shot.. he couldn’t seem to understand why I was against “trying out” something that wouldn’t leave my system for 8 months. Nevermind that I waited in the waiting room with a half-bald teenager and a acne-encrusted 30 year olds that both begged me not to let him do it to me lest I suffer through 8 months of similar side effects… obviously HE knew better!)
My grandmother served on a jury on a failed IUD contraceptive case back in the 70s (I think?) It kind of traumatized her, and even the very, very, very little she said about it caused me to shy away from IUDs.
I’m sorry, but little tiny “whoopsie” fetuses who somehow escaped being sloughed off, only to be stillborn at 5 and 6 months with coils that their skulls grew around and that they had fused into part of their body?
Uh, no thanks. Not worth it. I’d rather give birth to a baseball team than risk that.
Besides, how stupid are WE going to feel in about 100 years when people read about our “highly-scientific” metal IUD that rub the uterus raw? “Wait… so they put chunks of metal up into their uterus to bounce around and keep the zygote from implanting? Seriously?”
It’s going to look about as reasonable as cramming crocodile dung up your hoo-hoo or wearing a leather pouch with a cat’s liver on your foot to prevent pregnancy.
Sorry you’re going through this!
Exactly. I am hugely pro-choice, but my choice is not to use something that will prevent implantation. And I really REALLY can’t see how aggravating my uterus with a coil of metal is going to make me feel better.
To be fair, I know loads of women use the Mirena and love it, but I don’t think it’s for me.
Wow. I should have proofread better. With all that bad grammar and strangely-worded sentences, I sound like I belong on a street corner with a sign, hollering about the end of the world. :/
And a beanie with a pom pom. Everyone shouting about the end of the world needs a beanie with a pom pom.
gosh! I came here from River’s to get the conference link for OtherRants, and you are having a drama. So brave of you to argue with Dr.Quacks.
Sounds to me like early menopause and their solution for that will make you fat and furry too.
Women just can’t win.
If it was me, I would take the cont.pill every day forever and never bleed again, and also take an anti-depressant (if there was one that didn’t cause weight-gain) for the mood balancing.
or just drink heavily.
Quacks might sensibly refer you to a specialist on hormones (forget the word – is it endochronologist?).
Fen in Melb has been blogging her surgery and you could visit her, just to know you are not alone.
peace and love from me
Always drama here! Well, not always drama. Heh.
Which link were you after? Did you find it?
I think the pill would be okay, if it didn’t destroy my joints so badly. Rock, meet hard place. Sigh.
Hey, thanks for the link to Fen. Checking her out now.
This is the link to Fen sorry.
Her photos of her stomach staples are worth the clickthrough.
big hugs
i really hope stuff starts getting better for you hun..
going totally off subject for a second.. is there anymore ducklings??
Thanks 🙂
No more ducklings yet, although I think I’ve got a clutch due to hatch in around 10-14 days.
I ended up with a complete hysterectomy at 32 and it was the best thing to ever happen to me.
As I have von Willibrands I’d bleed like a slaughter house for days with my period, even after I had both my girls I bled for months afterward, needed D & C’s, always anaemic, tired, etc.
Couldn’t use the pill, loathed IUDs.
I think that’s where I’m headed too. Eventually.
What IS it with doctors and the Mirena??? I don’t want one either, but they just seem reluctant to even consider that a woman might have a valid reason for choosing not to go with an IUD.
Both my sisters ended up with hysters after using the Mirena, so I’m thinking it’s not the be all and end all cure for hideous bleeding, anyway.
Geez, chook, wouldn’t it be awesome if, just one time, you cut a break and something got fixed without adding to side-effects??
It seems the mirena is the new MIRACLE! it cures EVERYTHING! development in medicine at the moment.
I have absolutely nothing helpful to add to this conversation… But I wanted to say I’m very sorry you have to go through this.
It is ridiculous when you are only 21!!!
I can relate to the Hubby and the bad back thing. My hubby is a Cabinet Maker who pretty much gave up the tools because of his bad back and its always an ongoing thing.
Here’s hoping for much better days for you and your Hubs back .
Ex
Thanks, it’s frustrating that my body won’t do as it’s told.
Bleh, backs. I’m not sure I even want to think about Nat’s back anymore. I’m annoyed there too that no one is asking WHY his back is degenerating so badly, as I’m not sure his job before I got all broken would have caused this amount of degeneration.
Veronica: when you get to the end of the tube, I will have a cup of tea waiting here for you, since I arrived ahead of you.
Came here from River,
via your profile, tried blog 1, no,
got here and sidelined,
must get to your blog 3
re blog convention
after leaving wrong link
(yes again, from the bottom of that tube)
at dear Melb friend: http://confessionsofafoodnazi.blogspot.com/
My excuse for all is that
I am (not) coping with deranged geriatric parent worse than a toddler.
love,
Ann O’Dyne
Ah cups of tea are always lovely!
I want to know why more doctors don’t ask the simple question: “why?”
I really don’t know. I would have thought Why would be the most important thing, that working out why, would give you a place to start. Like at the beginning. It’s really frustrating, because something is causing this and I don’t think a bandaid fix of clotting medication or IVF drugs is going to help.
Also, curious, how the hell was he planning on prescribing gonadatropins to a 21 yo, who can’t take birth control? Gonadatropins are IVF drugs!
Sigh.
Fuck. Just….fuuuuuuuuck.
Don’t you love it how doctor’s want to be ALL UP IN YOUR UTERUS until you don’t actually want to let them in in the way they want you to, and then they don’t want to help you at all? Isn’t that AWESOME? It’s totally great how we won the right to vote but not to decide what goes on in our own fucking bodies.
Sorry. I’m ranty. This reminded me of going to my ‘six week’ post-natal check. First of all they didn’t even see me until SIXTEEN WEEKS after I gave birth. Then despite the fact that my CLEARLY NOT-six-week-old baby was sitting RIGHT there, very clearly 4 MONTHS old, the nurse couldn’t seem to get it through her stupid head that I was NOT in fact, six weeks post-natal (this is the same nurse who told me off when I was 37wks pregnant for not walking enough, when I was trying to tell her that I was disabled by pain and couldn’t walk to the toilet. Looking back, it was one of the MAJOR points at which someone should have picked up that something was wrong with me. I went into labour later that day and went through THREE WEEKS of slow labour and agony because no one would fucking listen to me) and when I said I was STILL bleeding, the entirety of her response and advice? ‘Oh. Well that’s not usual.’ REALLY? FUCKING REALLY? IS IT NOT?
*breathe*
*breathe*
*breathe*
This is part of why 14 months and a miscarriage later I still haven’t got on any long-term birth control. I am completely terrified of getting the same sort of treatment. I’m terrified of being put on something that makes me worse. My body over-reacts to oestrogen. I know this. I KNOW THIS. But a doctor is not going to listen. A doctor is going to think he knows me better than I do. A doctor is not going to care that the slightest change in my hormone levels will leave me unable to look after my toddler. A doctor is not going to care that this change might further disable me, leave me with even less quality of life than I already scrape together. The idea of bedside manner in the profession at the moment seems to be a joke, and not one doctor that I’ve spoken to or read about other people with similar problems speaking to, has convinced me any different.
It’s insane how often we are dismissed as being stupid, or not knowing our own bodies. Even when it comes to your EDS stuff (get a new doctor, PLEASE), the dismissal. I mean, SERIOUSLY.
Actually, here’s a story. I’m working with Early Intervention at the moment with the kids. If I present them with a problem, they look at it from all angles, accept that this is a tough thing to deal with and then get started working out the why of it, before coming back with a plan of action.
The first time this happened, I was shocked – because this was NEVER my experience of any health professionals. That these women, this awesome team could be taking what I said seriously, and they were supporting us and working out how to fix it? I nearly cried. It had never happened before.
It’s really sad that until EI, I had always felt defensive about medical staff, felt that I was being dismissed as faking, or stupid, or making it up.
But that’s what it’s been like. To be fair, ALL the med students I’ve come into contact with in the last 3-4 years (including the lovely girl who was part of my mothers group) have been interested and curious about everything, especially to know more about EDS and how to spot it in patients who aren’t presenting with dislocations. I’ve almost got some hope for the next generation of doctors.
I think doctors and medical staff who work with kids are better. When I took Bug to my GP and said ‘I think she’s allergic to milk’ he said ‘She isn’t, that’s impossible, there’s no such thing. Also she wouldn’t be getting any dairy through your breastmilk. The breasts act like very good filters *insert patronising little-girl smirk*’
The paediatrician we saw confirmed that she was allergic to dairy in under a minute based on what I told her of Bug’s symptoms and the fact that cutting out dairy had all but solved the problem. The dairy-trial that she had at 11 months confirmed, ACTUALLY MEDICALLY CONFIRMED that she was VERY allergic to dairy, and while the nurses/docs on the ward at the trial were pushy, they were also quite nice. I want to go back and beat my GP to death with the results.
I think it’s something that the first few years of medical work does to doctors that turns them. I’ve always found that the younger they are, the nicer they are. As soon as you hit kind of 30-35, you find they’ve just given up and turned into cold-hearted, unfeeling and unsympathetic asses with nothing but contempt for the vast majority of their patients. I think they burn-out pretty fast, it can be a terrible job. I’d feel sorry for them, except they get paid a fair amount of money to be assholes to me, and I get paid nothing to be disabled and in need of medical help they refuse to provide. So fuck it.
As far as I go, I’ve kind of run out of fight right now. I’ll pick myself back up once I’ve got my wind back and once I figure out how to go about squeezing more blood from this particular medical stone, but for now it’s easier to just stay out of the way than risk the soul-crushing humiliation of another pair of rolling eyes. I just can’t DO it right now. I feel like until my condition gets significantly more serious (hahahaha) then they’ll just say ‘Well we told you what’s wrong. What more do you want?’
I dunno, our Paed has been giving us trouble, whereas my GP is mostly okay. So I dunno if the working with kids thing holds true. Or maybe our Paed is just an arse. God knows we do better when we see the Residents instead.
(((hugs))) I hope you can sort out something to help. I know I had to push through a huge pain barrier to start getting a little stronger and now I’m, while still floppy/dislocatey, having better days.
Well. I say our Paed is awesome, but you may have read that she makes weird remarks about breastfeeding EVERY TIME I see her. So it’s up and down really. But at least she listens when I say there’s something wrong. I went in another time and was all ‘I think she has reflux’ and she was all ‘Coolio, want something to stop that?’ and gave it to me. Whereas my GP’s were like ‘But she’s not vomiting, and she’s gaining weight fine. She’s fine.’ omfg. The kid went from the 75th centile to the fricking 25th centile once she stopped comfort-feeding NON-STOP. She was in 12-18month clothes at 7months old. Nothing wrong my ASS.
I was just thinking, and I decided the best example of any medical professional I’ve ever seen was a dental surgeon. He was lovely. I came away wishing everyone in the medical profession was EXACTLY like him. Apart from the surgerising-me thing. If I could send you and Nathan my dental-guy, I would. I think you need him right now, both of you.
Ugh, Veronica, just ugh. Have they tested you for endometriosis ?
My period has been a mess lately too. Heavy, long, cramping all month long. Part of me wonders if there aren’t some environmental factors.
I think Endo is the issue tbh. I’ve asked about Endo and been fobbed off with ‘you’re 21 and you’ve gotten pregnant twice’. No matter that the only time I’ve ever managed to fall pregnant is in the month after I come off birth control pills.
I also know my paternal grandmother, the one who most likely gave us all the broken EDS gene had issues with low oestrogen, etc etc.
But no, they don’t want to check for things, they just want to fob me off with a mirena and a pat on the head.
Endo is EVIL (says she who has already had 1 surgery and will probably have more). See if the docs will put you on Syneral – it supresses ovulation and is actually used in IVF. I cant tolerate oral contraceptives AT ALL (my mother threatened to kick me out of home when I was on them I was so bloody moody) and my 6 months on Syneral were bliss – no cramping, no nausea, no bloating, no period!
As for the back – SHITE! you definately need to go see Arwen, strengthing it will help.
Drop me an email if you want to rant further.
Although from what I’ve heard, my symptoms feel a lot like Endo. I contemplate home-hysterectomy every time I have a period.
Thanks for the drug recommendations, I’ll ask them about it.
I am more cynical. I think they are on the payroll from the Mirena people. That is why the people who DO NOT HAVE a practice yet are listening but once they get a little bonus for prescribing Mirena? You’ll walk out with Mirena. If it were “Gumbledyzoo” pill that paid the most, you’d be in a big fight not to be taking “Gumbledyzoo.”
I don’t think it’s the age or training. Follow the money.
I’m not sure, as it’s the public system and ‘supposedly’ they’re not meant to be on the payroll from anyone.
But, with the pushing of the Mirena, I certainly considered that! It’s really annoying that they couldn’t listen and once they knew I was never going to ‘just agree’ to the Mirena, they treated me like a naughty child.
I’m sorry, but I’m one of the most compliant patients, IF I know the decision is the best one for me. The Mirena isn’t.
I feel for you Veronica having been a ‘bleeder’ too! The only good thing about my periods was that I was a late starter and my first was a few days before my 16th birthday! However it lasted for 12 days and I passed out several times from the pain and flooded almost continuously. I finally got my hysterectomy at 37! There is a medical procedure where the lining of the uterus is removed as an alternative to a full hysterectomy. My sister in the UK had this done and she then had virtually no bleeding for a couple of years although this result usually lasts for much longer (a full hysterectomy followed once she hit menopause as other problems arose). Perhaps this would help you if you do make the decision that there are to be no more babies as I don’t think pregnancy is an option afterward. Also a simple d & c sometimes has the same result but I hesitate to suggest that as it had the opposite effect when I had one and I had to take ergometrane (?sp) to stop the bleeding. It was after that debacle that I finally had my op!
Sorry to hear about Nathan’s back. Life is never simple is it! Hope his physio helps even though it is a bandaid after the event rather than a proper fix. My son is to go for more physio now to help him regain some strength in his back to go with the mobility he already has. At the last surgical review we were told that removing the hardware from his spine is unlikely to improve his flexibility as the vertebrae will have probably fused together by then anyway. I just keep telling myself how lucky he is not to be in a wheelchair or, even worse, flat on his back in bed for the rest of his life.
Is that the ablation? I think I’ve read about that and thought it sounded like rather a good idea once we’ve decided no more kids.
Backs, ugh.
That sucks, I bleed a lot too and the pill works but if it is not Yaz I feel like crap and am depressed and gain lots of weight, but for me Yaz is a miracle but that’s because my body cannot handle estrogen in big amounts so I need the progesterone based pills.
Whereas I’m really bad with progesterone and could probably stand to have some extra oestrogen. Heh. I’m glad you’ve got something that works though!
I hate doctors. All of them. Because of my chiari I can’t use any hormonal contraceptive, my gyno recommended a copper iud and when I said no because I don’t like the way they work she tried to convince me that the copper kills sperm. Bullshit.
Also, I have osteoarthritis, bone spurs and three slipped discs in my neck and back and my neurologist has told me that is quite normal for a 25 year old. Also bullshit. Hopefully they find something that will help Nathan, I know with my Dad the only treatment was surgery to fuse the bones together for stability and he still has a lot of pain.
It just never ends for you does it? As I said the other day, I really hope you catch a break soon!xo
I’m having trouble liking doctors lately too. Copper kills sperm? Yeah, right. Ha.
Normal for a 25yo? I don’t think so. What a pain in the arse.
Okay I haven’t read the comments but…
I’m so sorry to hear about Nathan’s back. 🙁
I’ve had the Mirena. I’ve never been pregnant & I probably have endo so keep that in mind.
IT WAS EVIL. Yes, I screamed on purpose.
My husband thinks it was invented by a sadist or an idiot. At least for women with endo.
My current treatment is high dose progesterone, called Aygestin in the US. You’ve already said that won’t work for you so I can’t offer any ideas. I just think you’re quite right to avoid the Mirena. Oddly enough I despised my Mirena but massive dose Progesterone has been one of the best things to happen to me. I was told that at 30 I couldn’t have a full hysterectomy. Plus, leaving an ovary would mean the endo would return so it would be pointless.
TMI next paragaph….
The docs told me that in 6 months i should stabilize. I was still passing walnut sized clots 6 months in and had to beg to have in removed. They wanted me to wait another 3 months! I was too weak to come in and be checked to see if I needed a blood transfusion for goodness sakes. I bled almost constantly and could barely stand up from the pain that entire time. Luckily while the insertion had me bed-bound for a week the removal only hurt for about a day.
I’d ask to see a reproductive endocrinologist and/or an endo specialist to talk about other options.
I’d say refusing the Mirena was a good idea for me then!
You know what the medical profession needs? Someone like you to become a doctor. All the life experience is worth far more than study without any concept of other human beings. My worst ever experience was with a female doctor who spent the entire consult looking at me like I was a whore because I am on the pill and I was open with her about my issues.
I am really glad that you know how to say no. A lot of women your age (and heck even mine at 27) will just go along blindly without asking questions. I think we need classes in assertiveness in high school!
I agree, assertiveness classes would go a LONG way! Hehe.
I’d love to work in medicine, but I don’t think my body would hold up to it. Shame.
Hi, Veronica. Now, I’ll preface this with the fact that I do not suffer from EDS, but I have menstruated since I was 11 year old. It was like having my internal organs ripped out violently for two days every cycle. I took Mersyndol until for some reason I cannot explain, it ceased to work (in my 20s?). In my 20s I also started to get ovulation pain. Then I found the little blue pills of peace, aka Naprogesic.
At age 13, Mum refused to allow the GP/obstetrician to do a D&C. I think she was right. At age 39, when my periods were lasting 23-25 days, the O&G doc suggested the same thing, yet couldn’t explain why it would help. He could only tell me that for some reason no-one was sure of why, in 80% of cases, it fixed the problem. Not good enough for me.
Mum also refused to allow me to take the OCP. So I drugged myself every 24-31 days (yes, irregular here too), until I had a pregnancy scare in my early 20s and the GP gave me a good talking to.
I’ve tried Implanon (when I was in a relationship and didn’t want to fall pregnant … wouldn’t have to worry about forgetting to take a pill); it made me entirely irrational and I bled for 3 out of 4 weeks. For a while, I was taking the OCP “… just until things settle down”. After 9 months, the GP couldn’t get it out, so it was a day surgery case. The anaesthetist’s comments? “Another one of these? Gee, we see these come in a lot … made my daughter completely psyhco”. She was in here early 20s, compared to me in my early-mir 30s. Back on the OCP I went.
Eighteen months ago, the bleeding became longer, spotting mid cycle. With the GOFA, we decided to see what mother nature did. I think I miscarried early this year. Back on the pill. Then I cracked the shits with the bleeding. The pill was obviously not working anymore for me, so I took myself off.
Pill free now for three months. Normal periods but HORRENDOUS ovulation pain. The sort that puts you a corner in the foetal position. But my cycle is settled, my bleeding has regulated and the little blue pills of peace are in my handbag, the drugs box, the car, the work locker, just in case I need them. Funny, I never thought I would prefer two days of pain every two weeks over 23 days straight of bleeding.
I agree with your ethical stance on IUDs. Thought I was the only one! Now I have only one more option and I would suggest it to you too. A good naturopath. If the doc’s have no options, perhaps there’s herbs or supplements that can help. I know magnesium is good for cramps. Sorry for the long winded response. I just empathise quite strongly with you on this one. X
My periods have been steadily getting longer, on average around 10-12 days now, but I have had cycles where I bleed for 6 weeks straight. It used to be that I would have to change my BC pills every 3 months, otherwise I’d just start bleeding and not stop.
I’d thought I was the only one to disagree with IUD’s too. It actually makes me wonder how much the doctors are telling the women about how they work, because they seem to be becoming the cure-all for all period issues. I am all for women having the choice to use them, after all, we all have to do what we’re comfortable with, but I also support educating women about how IUD’s work. Even the Mirena because it’s progesterone only isn’t a definite prevention against conception.
It’s odd, but I’m glad I’m not the only one who is miserable with period pain. Not that I want *anyone* to go through what we go through, but you know what I mean?
I miss my Nan, her period pain when she was my age was so bad, that she gave birth to my mother without feeling like she was in labour, because it was less painful than her periods.
*hugs* sometimes things are just unfairly crap. BG Xx
Yep. xx
Nothing to say, just so sorry to hear about Nathan’s back. How much more crap can get thrown your way? You’re going to be 22, going on 52 in life experience. No matter what happens – hold out on the home-hysterectomy 🙂
I hear home hysterectomies only end badly anyway. Heh. Ah well, racking up life experience can’t be a bad thing? Let’s just keep telling ourselves that.
Bleh.
I’m sorry to hear that Nathan’s back is screwed 🙁 Hope the PT and the like can at least give some relief.
Your poor bodies, and minds.
Me too. Stupid back.
The heavy bleeding and serious pain sound like possible endometriosis. Which can be cleaned up with an operation. But that’s all I know about it. i don’t know if it’s a permanent fix or if it grows back. And maybe you don’t have it anyway.
Like Marita mentioned a hysterectomy would be agood choice. If you weren’t only 21, I’d recommend it, but with only the uterus removed and the ovaries left intact, so you’d still get the hormones you need and not have to take hormone replacement pills.
I’m so sorry to hear that Nathan’s back is in such a bad state. He’s awfully young to have so many troubles like that. Physio can only do so much to help with flexibility. The pain is another matter altogether. Ouch!!
P.S. One of my daughters had pain so bad every month too and after having her children she discovered that her pain was much less when she switched to pads insted of tampons. She has endo, with some of the growth protruding into the vagina, and the tampons were aggravating it somehow. Switching to pads might help a bit?
I’ve tried that, sadly, it didn’t help. Would have been a nice fix though!
I’d like to be tested for Endo, but keep getting fobbed off with ‘you can’t POSSIBLY have endo’. It’s the reason I was referred to them in the first place!!
So long as I mention that I was doing a degree in pharmacology/physiology back before i had kids, they tend to listen to what I say tbh. It shouldn’t be that you need a background in that sort of stuff for them to take you seriously though.
It took MONTHS before anyone would refer Max for testing/observation for ASD, even though I had been saying so since he was about 18 months. Now they’re all over us like a rash though, in a good way!
((((hugs)))) xx
Hard, so hard. And no, we shouldn’t need to be studying something (or have studied it) but sadly, it seems to be how it works.
xx
Hi, just to throw this in to the mix. If you are done having kids there is the option that River mentions. I used to suffer with really bad cramps and bleeding. Endometrial ablation was offered by my GP and I was refered to my gynaecologist. The operation burns off the lining if the uterus, I had it done last year and it has changed my life. I have finished my family (I had 3 kids by the time I was 27 and the last one almost killed me) but was told that if I hadn’t already I would have to be steralised as it is very dangerous to become pregnant after the op. It can stop your periods, I haven’t been that lucky but I am very pleased with the results.
We’re not done with kids yet, but once we are, an ablation is sounding like it might be what I need.
I can so relate to this. I have a very unique body. It never responds the way that doctors “know” it will to things. I cannot have ANY type of hormonal interference and even a plain old IUD makes me bleed constantly. The only type of contraception that works for us is Beefcake getting the snip. As for my periods, well, I have a fair idea why they have been a nightmare all of my life. I am 33 now and they are kinda, sorta regular now and last for only 7-8 days and only feel like I am in labour about 1 out of 3 months. That’s an improvement right? Unfortunately, the medical establishment is not good at dealing with bodies that are not “normal”. I really doubt anyone will ever join the dots effectively as to what’s wrong with me. I hope that’s not true for you.
Neither does mine. And while I can generally tell how I’ll react, having to fight the doctors who won’t believe me is starting to wear on me.
Wow. There’s a lot of info in those comments. I have no experience with any of these issues so just ((((hugs)))) and I hope you can find a solution that works for you. And when you do, beat your bloody doctor round the head with a mirena.
Bad news about Nathan’s back. I hope it can at least be managed so that he can stay mobile and relatively pain free (I’d hope for totally pain free for him but I guess that’s not going to happen).
I know, a huge amount of info.
Maybe I need to make a giant Mirena, just for bludgeoning with? It’s very very tempting.
Ha ha – the girl’s version of the dildo scene from A Clockwork Orange 😉
Yep, that’s the one.
So sorry about Nathan’s back. Were any pain management strategies offered?
My daughter has similar problems with her periods and no one takes a blind bit notice. Except me obviously. Its an uphill struggle I know. I don’t have any bright ideas but will go off and look for some information on hormones and EDS written by Prof. Bird over in the UK. Although BG may have already linked you to this.
xoxoxoxoo
No, no pain management strategies. Heh. Luckily, unless he moves badly, or overworks himself, he isn’t in pain at the moment. Which is good.
I would love some info from Prof Bird, it would be nice to have a whole ream of information to throw at them next time I see them.
xxxx
Why are you NOT seeing a Doctor with a vee-jay-jay and boobs?
Because it’s the luck of the draw and I was ‘lucky’ enough to get blokes. Not that that means anything tbh, I’ve seen most of the Gyn’s there during my pregnancies and they’re not any more likely to treat me well.
Well this just plain sucks. But I guess you already knew that ;P
What I find intriguing is that there’s so much emphasis on the fact that you’re 21…. as if your periods should be all sorted out and running like clockwork by now?? or that you couldn’t have endometriosis so early in your ‘period career’? WTF is with this reasoning without any investigation? QUACKS. I say, fwiw, if you have had your period for only 10 yrs AND delivered two term babies in that time (so, that’s 18-ish months out of those 10 yrs), then that’s not exactly time for your reproductive system to have really established itself or reveal any underlying condition.
And I have no idea if you have gone this route or anyone has already suggested (sorry if they/you have), but I would thoroughly recommend an excellent homoeopath OR naturopath who specialise in women’s/fertility health. Sometimes it pays to circumvent all the western medical know-all (know-nothing) practices. At the very least, a change of gynae for a second opinion sounds to be in order, love! This one seems more intent at just corking the problem not seeking the cause of the issue and that is borderline negligent.
I guess that I would assume my periods should be regular now, after 10 years of them and 2 babies. Regularity would be nice. But yeah, my body is so wonky, no assumptions can really be made without investigations. And they’re really not wanting to even do simple blood tests.
I’ll have to look into a naturopath.
Really interesting reading! I have been contemplating the Mirena. Thanks for sharing and also, thanks for the blog comment!
Kirsty
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