Google searchers! I wonder what they were actually looking to find?

Celebrites with big bodies – Why not celebrities with freakishly small bodies? Why do you want to know about large celebrities?

wombat in my yard – I had one too! Messy critter it was.

trying to conceive “got my period” – You and me both. Damn TTC.

bloody POSSUM – Now, why did you feel the need to capitalize the possum bit? Lets just shoot all the possums and then my life would be good.

refusal stories – refusal to do what exactly?!

my toddler refuses to wean – Mine too. Want to be my friend? I swear, my nipples are going to be numb forever.

toddler squeezes moms breast – Yes, mine also twiddles my nipples, pull up my top just to kiss me and then spends ages just checking that everything is the same.

Lotus and Braden – Sweetie, you don’t want me. Here is the lovely lady you were after.

my daughter says no to everything – I am waiting for this stage. I bet I will hate it.

why sleep is important to babies – Because without it their mothers would go insane. Trust me, EVERYONE needs sleep.
Amy Feather Jones – Uh okay?

What is keeping me from going insane – The little voices in your head saying it is a bad idea.

feather tickling stories – I’m not gonna ask. But I promise you won’t find it here.
he was wearing a dress – I dressed my little brother up in a dress and makeup once. He wouldn’t let me take photos of it *sigh* such a pity, he was such a pretty girl. He was 5.

Looking up dresses in public – Just don’t do it. Someone will kick you eventually!

I am a teenager and my daddy makes me sit in a trolley at the supermarket – That is just creepy.

Photo saggy breasts – I have them, but I am not going to photograph them.

How to catch a possum – Well, you could always try sprinkling salt on it’s tail…

Today as we were driving into town, Nathan and I were chatting. Amy was in the back seat talking away to herself when we realised exactly what she was saying.

‘Shit!’

‘Quick!’ I gasp, trying not to giggle, because giggling would be bad. ‘Don’t pay any attention to her. Ignore it.’

We studiously didn’t giggle (I am so proud) and she said it again.

‘Shit!’

[strangled gasps from the parents]

‘Oh dear’ says Nathan, ‘I think we have been swearing too much lately’

‘Uh huh’ I agree. ‘We need to swear less’

‘Shit! Shit! Shit!’ says Amy ‘Shit shit shit’

‘No, you need to swear less’ says Nathan.

‘I don’t swear that much!’

‘Yes you do’

‘Bugger off, I don’t. Shit. Oh shit! Bugger, I’m doing it now aren’t I?’

‘Yup.’

‘Oh dear’

‘Yup’

Luckily, at that moment, a good song came on the radio (Men at Work – Land Down Under) and we turned it up and sang along. By the end of the song Amy had forgotten about her new word, especially as there were drinks to drink and balls to drop.

THANK GOD!

Ooops, I mean thank goodness.

I contemplate the boxes in front of me. Amy runs riot around the house, content in her own company. I take the time to pack some things up.

I start with Amy’s books. I have about 90% packed when Amy discovers what I am doing. Suddenly it is like Christmas and she gleefully starts removing books from the box.

I stand up and remove her from her discovering. She gets plonked on the couch with 2 of her favourite books, they won’t be packed until the day before the move.

She tosses the books aside and returns to helping me. I wonder if sitting on her would be a bad thing. At least then she wouldn’t be undoing everything I have done already?

No, she squirms too much to be sat on. Plus, I think I am probably a little heavy for her. It is still tempting me though.

I put it out of my mind.

I repack all the books that Amy has removed from the box and try to convince her to help.

‘Sweetie? Put the book back in the box. No, Amy, put it IN the box. Don’t take another one out! Look, okay, now you have 2, surely that is enough? HEY! No no no! You can’t climb into the box as well! Get back out of there! Help Mummy put the books into this box.’

She looks at me as if I am daft and keeps removing books from the box. I end up with a vision of my daughters head poking out of a sea of books, unable to move, but happy because the box hasn’t defeated her.

I shake my head and try to move on.

Amy runs away and looks back at me inviting me to chase her. How can I resist? We spend 10 minutesrunning around the house giggling before I sit back down to pack.

I get all the books done and start to pack DVD’s. Amy decides that it is great fun to open all the DVD cases and hand me the discs and covers separately. Unfortunately I can’t seem to teach her how to match them back together.

Amy runs away again and I resume the packing of the DVD’s.

I close the box up and lug it out to the sunroom, where it joins the boxes of computer stuff that Nathan packed.

I wander around the house, wondering what else I can pack before I completely lose motivation. Maybe my novels? No, they will be going in plastic bags.

The kitchen? Great thought, but we still need to eat for the next 8 days.

Maybe the linen.

Maybe the non-essential clothes.

I pondder these, but I come to the conclusion that as soon as I pack all the linen, Amy will guaranteed get sick and vomit over everything.

I resolve to not tempt Murphy. I leave the linen in the cupboard and the clothes where they are. I will pack them the night before the move.

I start on Amy’s non-essential toys. Funnily enough, everytime I put something in the box it becomes the NEWEST! FAVOURITEST! toy and god forbid I should dare take it away from her.

Finally after I pack the box eleventy hundred times, I am able to close the flaps.

I find myself wondering is packing the toddler is a bad idea….

*******************************

I did a pregnancy test this morning and got a negative. The spotting changed to bright bright red before I went to bed, but by this morning had gone back to brown.

No idea what is going on, but it certainly isn’t a period. (yeah, my periods have never been that shade of bright red)

I probably need to see a doctor, but I won’t be able to get near one until Wednesday and by then I would imagine that whatever is going on will have stopped.

Ah well. Onwards and upwards. I still have an entire kitchen/bathroom/loungeroom to pack.

I got my period on time, even though we know we nailed the timing. However, my period only lasted 3 days (normally 7) before fading off into some on again/off again spotting before finishing.

I also normally have terrible period pain and this time I didn’t have a single cramp or ache.

Then on Sunday I had a little more spotting (4 days after my period finished), very unusual for me because I never spot mid cycle. Ever. Once my period has stopped, that it is.

So after a little spotting Monday (not even enough to warrant a panty liner) a bit yesterday and a bit this morning, I am now feeling crampy and yucky and the spotting is getting a touch heavier and is more pinky that brown.

Nathan is going to buy me a preg test tonight before he goes to work, but I won’t be able to do it until the morning (it is late Wednesday night at the moment).

So my internets what do you think?

Is a pregnancy possible or not?

Ah also, we haven’t been having sex (too many other things going on since my period finished) so I can’t even blame it on sex.

Ideas?

How the hell did it get this late without me actually getting hardly anything done? Dude, I need an extra few hours in my day. You know, those ones that don’t actually count towards anything.

Now I could have a whine about my dialup and how it keeps dropping out on me. With no warning, just BOOM! Please reconnect!

And then? Once I have redialled to connect? My ISP’s computer thingy won’t connect to me.

Dodgy bloody thing. Ah well, what can I expect for nothing.

We got the very final bits of paperwork for the house in today.

10 days people, 10 days!

Then! We can move!

And we can get a puppy!

And put in a vegie garden!

Anyway, would you like to see what I have been doing all evening?

Food!