Author: Veronica

It doesn’t rain, but it pours.

Thankyou all for the lovely comments on my last post. My boob is hardly sore at all now and I am feeling human again. Wonderful things these antibiotics.

However, this morning I discovered that THING that is the bane of mothers lives everywhere.

That THING that causes blogger mother especially to cringe and count the amount of hours they now won’t have left for blogging.

That THING that makes for a shitload of work and washing, all needing doing before bedtime.

I discovered headlice.

I got one louse out of Amy’s hair and two out of mine. Inspection of Amy’s hair shows no eggs that I can see, and when Nathan looked through my hair, he didn’t find any eggs either. (But then, he didn’t really know what he was looking for).

I have combed my hair, I have conditioner-ed (is that a word? To bad, ’tis now) my hair and combed it through. For AAAAAAAAAAGES and found no more bugs.

Bugs and hair aside, do you have any IDEA the amount of washing you have to do when you strip THREE beds? Yes, three, Amy sleeps in a cot/single bed together remember?

Lots of washing.

Lots and lots of freaking washing. ESPECIALLY when the small one won’t sleep on just a plain sheet. No, she needs a fluffy blanket underneath her sheet and one on topof her sheets, for her cheek to rest in because they are SOFT.

I got 2 machine loads of bedding just out of Amy’s bedroom. Remembering that I have a 7kg washer. *sigh*

A lot of washing.

Thank god I didn’t find more than one louse in Amy’s hair. Can anyone imagine trying to hold down a Toddler so that you can comb their hair out, over and over again?

Not my idea of a fun time.

The only place I can think of, where I may have had some small contact with children, was the Doctors surgery on Sunday. All their chairs are cloth covered so I think I may have picked up a louse there. It is the only thing I can think of, because no one else I have seen recently has headlice.

(Yes I do know this, I have rung everyone)

However the combing will continue until my hair falls out I am satisfied that no nits could POSSIBLY remain.

Even if that means sitting on Amy while I comb her hair twice a day.

**UPDATED: Thankyou so much to Jenty, who has nominated my blog for the bloggers choice awards.

Now I’m going to be a vote whore and ask you to pretty pretty please go and vote for me. Please? With cherries and whipped cream and whatever else floats your boat. Please?

I have been feeling a little fluey and off colour for a few days, but yesterday it hit me like a ton of bricks, along with an excruciatingly sore breast.

My Mum took me to the after hours doctor while Nat looked after Amy and joy of joys, mastitis was diagnosed.

I’m still not feeling 100%, like walking and chasing the toddler isn’t fun or easy, but I am a bit better than yesterday. As long as I don’t have to stand up, or move my right arm.

Or think too hard.

I have antibiotics and Amy is feeding well from the sore side (even though it hurts like a bastard).

So, knowing how sick I am, when Amy was being quite quiet in the kitchen this morning, I was happy. She wasn’t that deathly silence that signifies trouble, just a lovely quietness that was a break from the constant whining we have been having because EGADS! Mummy isn’t playing with me RIGHT NOW!

Eventually she wandered back over to me.

Complete with four lolly snakes in her hand, one in her hair and three stuck to her top.

Hmmmm, she had stretched REEEEEALLY high and managed to get the open packet of snakes out of the cupboard.

Fun!

I had to rescue all the non-chewed snakes and put them back away. So now I have a sticky, sugar hyped, whining Toddler running around.

I want to go back to bed.

Everything is dying.

However, everything looks so pretty because it drizzled overnight. Not much, but enough to make it smell amazing and make me want to take photos. The green patch you can see? That is where my grey water run off is.

Everything is still grey and chilly. You’d never believe it is the middle of summer. I am loving it.

Amy has new gumboots. She thinks they are fantastic. Thankyou Mum.

She does love the shoes.

The apples on my apple tree were still wet from the drizzle. I have been watering them with the bath water so that they didn’t die. Hopefully we can get some ripe fruit before we move out of here, I would hate to have the possums eat the apples.

I had to throw this one in here. You know you’re jealous right? He also cleans the bathroom and he does all the mopping. I love him and no! you can’t have him.

See more weekly winners here.

My first bit of advice? Don’t try this. I test these things so that you don’t have to.

Give Toddler something appealing to do. Maybe fingerpaint with a bowl of cereal?

Once you are sure Toddler is occupied sit down and open your laptop.

Replace Toddler in her highchair.

Sit back down and open laptop.

Get up and replace Toddler’s spoon. Give her an extra 3 or 4 spoons just in case she drops one.

Watch all the spoons fall on the floor. Resign yourself to giving Toddler a daytime bath as she eats with her hands.

Sit down and open laptop. Again.

Start to write.

Freakout as Toddler tries to bash on the keyboard with cereal covered fingers. Shut laptop and run a bath.

Sit in the bathroom and watch Toddler play in the bath. Wish that you had Wi-fi so you could blog while doing it. Wonder if that makes you addicted.

Get Toddler out of bath. Make sure you remember to SHUT THE GODDAMN BATHROOM DOOR.

Dry and dress Toddler. Remind self that as soon as you leave her nappy off she WILL poo on the floor. Elect for a nappy and pants.

Sit down to blog while Toddler plays in the pantry.

Silence.

SPLOOOOOOOOOSH. SCREEEEEEEEEEEAM.

Remember that you forgot to shut the bathroom door.

Pull Toddler out of the bath and strip her clothes off. Cuddle her. Lots.

Re-dry and re-dress Toddler. Remark on how The Pile is running out of clothes. Remind self to do washing already.

Once Toddler is occupied with her ball, sit down and open laptop. Re-read what you have written. Try to remember what you were going to write.

Get into the groove of writing. Get some good stuff down. Freakout when the Toddler bashes on your keyboard AND MANAGES TO CLOSE THE WINDOW!

Console self with the fact that it would have saved.

Realise that your internet had been disconnected and you had written everything without it being saved. Die a little inside.

Put the laptop down.

Read the Toddler a book, play soccer with her, go for walks, feed her, read more books.

Put Toddler down for a nap. FINALLY!

Pick up laptop.

Put down laptop as Toddler cries.

Re-settle Toddler.

Pick up laptop.

Put down laptop as Toddler cries.

Re-settle Toddler by snuggling and cuddling her.

Wake up an hour later with a Toddler still wrapped around your neck. Put Toddler down and sneak downstairs for a little blogging time.

Start to write. Realise that you have forgotten everything you were going to say. Start to write anyway. Inspiration will come.

The phone rings and disconnects the internet.

Give up.

Resolve to write all your blog posts after 9.30pm when Toddler is sleeping and phone callers can be politely sworn at.

…that I use to keep my house clean. *SNORT*

Have you seen my house lately? No? Well, lets just say that the tips probably aren’t working.

Anyway, Witchypoo tagged me with her meme that she came up with all by herself and honestly, it is a great meme.

Instructions:

Write your tip(s) with a link to who sent the meme to you, along with the instructions. They are better if they are your own discovery, or not widely known. Still, tips that make a difference to you are all good. After your tips, you will want to tag some friends who may even be hard up for blog fodder.

1- Bi-carb soda will shift any amount of grot. Caked on muck inside your oven? Make a paste of bi-carb and water, smear it on, leave for 10 or so mins, come back and wipe off. With a small amount of scrubbing everything will be like new.

Magic stuff. Buy some now.

I use bi-carb for those pesky stains that develop around oven hot plates and for the butter that burns onto baking pans.

So now that I have told you about my huge bi-carb fetish secret, I find I am out of ideas. At least household ideas. So onwards and upwards I say.

2- To keep toddlers clean while eating? Serve all food in the bath tub. Bread swells substantially when wet, so make sure you serve plenty of sandwiches. Toddler will end up fuller and everyone will be happier. Of course, you need internet access in the bathroom so that you don’t miss out on blogging while Toddler is silent and eating.

If you can’t get internet access in the bathroom, I highly suggest setting up a tub full of water somewhere you do have internet access. Either that or a set of intricately arranged mirrors so you can see around corners.

3- To quell The Shriek? Duct tape is your friend. Either that or buy yourself some earplugs.

OR

4- We all want those pre-child pre-aging perky boobs don’t we. Now, I have come up with a revolutionary way to make your boobs perk back up to where they used to be.

The answer is simple. Just put on a breast hugging t-shirt and no bra, then hang upside down. Your breasts will instantly end up back where they used to be. Simple really. We should really all embrace walking on our hands.

WARNING: Do not attempt to do this anywhere near a boob obsessed toddler when your t-shirt is NOT breast hugging. You WILL end up with a toddler attempting to feed while your boobs fall out of your top. Toddler will find it hilarious and you will be stuck upside down.

I am tagging –

Frog Ponds Rock

Lotus

Imaginary Binky (Sarah)

Laura

Bee

Kelley

and

Nikki

I tagged some of my newer commenters as well as some old friends. Thanks guys for coming over and visiting me.