I feel like I’m at my wits end.
And to be honest, I wasn’t even going to blog about it, because it’s more of a hunker down and deal with it type thing, than a whinge about it on the Internet type thing.
Amy has forgotten how to listen. I know that it’s all about her being TWO! and exerting her independence to either listen to me or not, but it is driving me mad. If I sit her down and make eye contact and make her listen, it immediately dissolves into a tantrum.
Her tantrums aren’t that hard to deal with honestly. They generally involve some stomping and some throwing of herself on the ground silently. Sometimes they involve crying, but we ignore tantrums so she knows that they don’t work.
Hence the silent throwing herself on the ground ones. I think they just her way of getting her shit back together again. 2 minutes of laying on the ground with her head hidden and BAM, she’s good to go again.
But the not listening. Oh my word, the not listening.
I feel like a broken record as I tell her not to do something 100 times and she still goes ahead and does it.
Like not jumping on me.
Or climbing onto the bench.
Or pulling the books out of the bookshelf.
Or emptying her entire toy box on the floor and then refusing to help pick them back up.
Or jumping/kicking/sitting on the dog.
Or any of the other hundreds of things that Toddlers just do to drive us mad.
I know that alot of it is simply me being out of energy and patience, but those things aren’t her fault (okay, they are a little bit her fault, but she can’t help that).
We’ve reinstated time outs for poor behaviour (she had stopped needing them because just the threat of time out worked).
I’ve cut almost all sugar out of her diet.
There is to be no more cordial or juice given as drinks, she can have water or nothing. She is allowed milk, but only from a regular cup and only 1cm at a time as I am sick of her sipping and spitting the milk all over the house.
No giving in to nagging, no matter how much easier it might be.
And the big thing, no more milk overnight. I’m sick of her waking every 2-3 hours to let me know her milk is empty and needs filling. I stopped breastfeeding overnight more than 12 months ago to stop night wakings, not to just replace them with a sippy cup.
We stopped milk overnight 2 nights ago and mostly she has been sleeping better. Ish. Really, with Amy better is a relative term.
So fingers crossed that some of these things start to pay off soon.
[It’s not all bad though, she is still cuddly and snuggly, gives kisses on demand and will talk about whatever is bothering her once prompted to ‘talk to me, tell me what’s wrong, don’t just cry/whine/yell’. Plus, she has the mother of all colds so she hasn’t exactly been feeling 100%. Funnily enough, I was sure her cold was getting better, but last night and today she has practically drowned me in snot. Not fun]
While we’re talking about behavioural issues, I should really mention Seven.
Seven was a difficult dog to toilet train, but recently she had been really good.
Recently, as in, up to 3 days ago.
3 days ago, Seven starting shitting inside again.
Now, my answer to that was simply ‘Fuck it, I cannot deal with this, dogs go OUTSIDE.’
However, that didn’t exactly work, because yesterday, as Nathan and I cleaned up the study, while we were IN THE ROOM, she shat inside 3 times. Within an hour.
I would have killed her. Nathan was much gentler than I would have been and I don’t know if that is a good thing or not.
This morning I woke up to find dog shit on the bathroom floor AND underneath the table in the dining room. This despite me putting her outside at midnight, 3am, 6am and 8am when we got up for the day.
Nathan reckons that it is because the cat and kitten have been sleeping inside. He seems to think that it’s territorial.
I don’t disagree. Not exactly.
But the cat and kitten have been inside for nearly 3 weeks now, if it was territorial, wouldn’t she have started it 3 weeks ago, not 3 days?
Sigh.
So here I am. Venting. I am out of energy and patience. I just want Seven to stop it and be good and stop the constant fucking whining already. I just want Amy to listen and talk and behave without me having to stand there and MAKE you behave.
I want it to be easy.
((hugs)) It’s so bloody frustrating when they don’t listen isn’t it?
I reckon if I had a dog like that I would have found another home for her by now tbh – especially with the little un on the way soon too!
Venting is totally what blogging is all about – especially for mummy-bloggers, so vent and rant away!
Totally with you on wanting it to be easy – hell even moderate would be ok for me! lol 😉
Marylins last blog post..Stress
Oh sister, I feeeel you.
If it’s any consolation, we have to tell the five- and six-year-olds to do the same thing at least once a day, probably ten times a day on a bad one.
I know, that wasn’t a consolation!!!
But it does get better. Promise!!
Ashs last blog post..It makes me smarter?
Hugs! I think they all kids go through stages up and down, and just when you think you’ve got the best kids, they start driving you mad again. And although she doesn’t poop in the house, (because then I really WOULD take her to the pound) I can sympathize on the dog thing. Sally sheds, and tracks dirt through the house, and takes kibble out of her bowl to eat it on the carpet….if someone opens the door too wide she runs out into the street, (never away, just back and forth and to all the neighbours houses until you lure her home with cheese. It’s her favourite game) I do love her, but honestly, since having Bad, I’d probably give her up if Hubs would let me…..
I hope things ease up soon. You know, so the madness can begin anew when the baby comes….:)
badness joness last blog post..Roarrrrrr!!!!!!
Oh, yuck. I can deal with almost anything but dog poo. Maybe everyone is sensing the difference with the job and the pregnancy being almost over… I dunno. Maybe not.
Brave woman, cutting sugar out of Amy’s diet. I don’t think I could have been so bold. Hugs to ya.
Mrs. Cs last blog post..Scrolls. And Blueberry Bread.
I would so come take Amy off your hands for a day if I could, but I live to far away. I use to work with two year-olds and can get them to listen most of the time. I feel for you, hope you get some relief soon.
Megans last blog post..Thanksgiving
You poor thing.
I have enough trouble dealing with adults whilst being pregnant, let alone children and dogs.
I’m constantly shouting and baby squirms everytime I do it.
I also have moments of pure ecstasy and joy at being pregnant and moments of utter selfishness.
(Like right now sitting in my pj’s sipping a hot chocolate when theres housework to be done)
Keep the dog outside…our dog was always inside and never shat until one day 3 huge piles in the bathroom then she went outside and has not come back. I plan to have her inside every now and then to interact with baby so she doesnt feel jealous.
Aw – hugs sweet one. I have no words to console you, so I have to hope that virtual hugs will do some good.
Methinks that you’re worried about the new little one – and that’s taking up a bunch of your energy that you’d normally have to deal with Amy. And Nathan may be right about Seven – the newness of the cat and kitten may have been okay for a couple of weeks – and now that things aren’t changing, the dog has decided that shitting inside is going to get your attention.
Breathe deeply. I wish I was nearby to come help.
XX
Rees last blog post..Grace in Small Things: 1/365
I can tell you how I handle Colin, which works like a charm when I can keep it up. It is always me, though. When I use too much force, or don’t let him decide about things, I pay the price.
If I “tell him not to do something”, he is guaranteed to do it. Instead, I started telling him why I don’t like him doing something, but I let it be HIS choice. I’ll explain, but tell him it is up to him. Or I’ll just say, “That’s probably not a good idea, Colin, because the stove is hot and it will hurt your hand.” Now that he knows I’m letting him choose, when I recommend something, he usually listens to me. Though it has taken a while.
Recently I realized that the whole reason he doesn’t want to wear clothes is because I force him to get dressed, so I decided fuck it. I don’t care if he’s naked. When he feels cold enough, he can put clothes on. It is getting better, now that we’re not in a battle of wills about it. He chooses to put clothes on more often than not, and that’s alright with me.
I’ll tell you, it isn’t easy, and it can mean lots of messes and toys on the floor, spilled water, burnt fingertips, etc. but he got the idea that I wasn’t going to force him, and now when I tell him why something isn’t a good idea, he listens and chooses for himself. His choice is more and more the one that I’d like him to make.
Really, I just think that the whole “Terrible Two’s” thing is the fact that they are not babies – they are people, and they want to have their own power of choice. So if I find ways to let him have as many choices as possible, it goes better for all of us.
The dog, though? The dog is out to get you. What the hell.
Kats last blog post..Selling Stuff – Recycled Jeans Christmas Stockings
Move Seven outside. Permanently. It’s summer, she won’t freeze. Maybe you could leave the toys and make a game of picking them up just before bedtime? If they’re in your way (like you’re tripping over them) just grab the broom and sweep them into a corner. I did this (kind of) when I had 3 little ones. They all slept in the one big bedroom and the toys lived in the small third bedroom. During the day they would get spread out through the living room and hallway, if I tripped over one I swept the whole lot back into the room. At night I didn’t even pick up, I just swept everything into the small bedroom and shut the door.
Ohhhhh! Me, too!
The two dogs are on their way out! They pee all the freakin’ time, our house is infested with fleas and my ankles are proof enough, they bark when the toddler sleeps and a bazillion times during the night, they fight over food, they track dirt all over my clean floors and they love to rub in cat shit outside. And of course, no one has the energy nor time to bathe them. Ugh! If my toddler wasn’t so in love with them and call their names so sweetly, I think they would either A. not be alive any more or B. be far, far away.
As for the toddler listening? Don’t you hate it when they just stare at you and do whatever you told them not to any way, just to rub it in? Ugh! Sometimes I feel bad because I know he’s tired, but the tantrums have gotten old super fast. I need a vacation!
((hugs))
Sorry everything is annoying at the moment. I have no advice because in my experience you just have to ride out the horrific behaviour crap. Especially as you are already doing all the stuff that makes sense. How is she feeling about impending siblingdom?
The dog. Ewwww. I’m just sorry about that.
Alis last blog post..Bababababababa
A bit of a hippy reaction here, but you know what I reckon?
They are both reacting to the impending arrival.
Amy obviously for attention, and the dog is marking their territory, just not against the cats!
Xbox4NappyRashs last blog post..Vagina bucket
Lots of hugs Veronica. You’re right, it’s just a phase. One day she will start listening, then she will turn 10 and stop again. *Sigh* It’s like a neverending battle. We just give up one for another.
As for dog poop. I would have throttled my dog by this point. Or kick her ass outside.
*HUGS*
Jenn FLs last blog post..Gobble, Gobble
Aww, it’s hard when you have a little one driving you nuts and then to be big and pregnant on top of it makes it so much worse!
As for the damn dog it either needs to go see the vet because something is wrong or it’s being a little hateful spiteful bitch and needs to live outside!
Jenns last blog post..Boys! Boys! Boys!
We have a cat that pees all over the place. It can really tear away at your patience. It’s disgusting.
I think that on top of a toddler and being pregnant….yikes. I feel for you.
It’s VERY hard to be a parent.
I think people without kids have this idea that children are born sweet, easy, and innocent. As long as you’re a good parent, everything will go well. If your child is difficult or misbehaves, it’s because you’re a bad parent.
That’s such bullshit though. Children can be incredibly frustrating. They can make the best of mothers want to tear their hair out and scream at the top of their lungs.
I say when any mother manages to stay relatively sane during the infant, toddler, and teenage years…she deserves a medal.
Dinas last blog post..I’ll see his movie….someday.
I definitely know what your are talking about. It is not easy that is for sure. Hang in there and it will get better after the baby is born it wont be as bad. It will get easier. you will be in my thoughts and prayers i wish you the best. kayla-.
kaylas last blog post..Happy Thanksgiving
I agree with Dina and I just happen to have a couple of medals handy…
I think it but probably dont say it often enough, I reckon you are doing a great job…
Now do you want a great big shiny Medal? Or the chocolate one?
xxxxxx mum
frogpondsrocks last blog post..A blank screen..
I swear by crate training the dog and leaving it in the crate overnight (and when you leave the house unattended). Crate training is not a punishment but it totally solved a number of behavior issues with our dog that we adopted.
About Amy, I don’t think you can crate train her… Well you could if you were really mad. 😛
Talinas last blog post..Did you “Black Friday” shop?
After our kids were born, my dogs HAD to start sleeping in their crates at night….otherwise they’d poop or pee all over my house. They regressed to “puppy behavior” after bringing home babies. It’s taken more than 2 years, and ONE of the dogs is now allowed to sleep next to my bed. But the first time he slips up again, he’ll be crated at night. Crazy freakin’ animals.
I’m here to tell you that terrible two’s is NOTHING compared to Horrible Freakin’ Five. Wynnie is so willful that she’ll do things that piss me off, KNOWING it’ll get her time out. Since I don’t spank–she knows she won’t be bludgeoned to death and she just pushes every single button I have. I’m kind of wishing I spanked.
Seriously? Sometimes it’s so frustrating keeping these little humans and pets from driving mommies insane.
Hyphen Mamas last blog post..One Word: Blackmail
*hugs* I hate days like that, especially when they’re one after another after another. It sounds like you’re dealing with Amy really well. Being consistent and firm is so important, as is making sure they know who’s boss. Sometimes I outright tell my stepkids, “You are not the boss. I (or Daddy) am the boss.” It actually seems to help them.
And as for Seven. Yes, outside she goes. That’s what I would do. My kitties occasionally “go” around the house, especially if they have an opinion they wish to make known. So gross.
Hang in there. You’re doing a great job.
aww.. hun..
thinking of you..
read my blog.. 🙂
(hugs) …not you too ! Stay strong it will pass so I am told …
I hear you … on the not listening and making them behave or tidy the toys… not fun and I hate making threats to my boys.I haven’t tried cutting sugar …*shrugs* maybe I couldn’t cope with the whingeing – it would be worse.
I hope it gets better for you soon and Seven …oh my stars …I wouldn’t have the patience. I hate dog poop.
Trishs last blog post..Not so … Wordless Wednesday
Any consolation – my 3 year old is extremely hideous at the moment and I too am nearing my wiys end 🙂
M & Bs last blog post..Lost: Domestic Routine. Please return here if Found
“Wits” even
M & Bs last blog post..Lost: Domestic Routine. Please return here if Found
That totally sucks. You are making me wanna give away my 15 month old before she gets to the terrible two’s!!!
We’ve been dealing with some of these behavior issues as well, and, like you said, a lot of it is my own exhaustion and short temper these days. But I feel like all the whining and tantruming is ruining our last few weeks as a mommy/son team and that makes me even more frustrated.
Jennis last blog post..UPDATE: No Baby, No Cry
I think the actors were onto something.
Never work with kids or animals, let alone kids AND animals.
Pity we’re not actors.
Hugs.
It sucks to be the bad guy sometimes.
tiffs last blog post..Weekly Winners – 3rd birthday edition.
You poor thing. That is alot to deal with. As far as Amy is concerned you seem to be on the right track. Consistency is the key- that and the fact that this will pass and she will move on the a “new” stage for better or worse.
I have to second the idea of a crate for Seven. Both of my dogs are crate trained and they actually go in them when we are not home but even when we are they will go in on their own. Dogs do not like to go to the bathroom where they sleep!!
Hope it gets better soon….
put seven in a crate,,, that way she will have to hold in her poo,,,,, umm yeah good luck on Amy this is ony the begining,, sorry…… I am off to bed I hope you are getting some kind of rest.
Just a moms last blog post..NEED INPUT……
Julia doesn’t listen either. And dogs? Ugh. Lola doesn’t shit in the house, but she chews everything. And after my whole Lola’s-coming-inside-for-good effort, she is, at this moment, outdoors. Because she bit my boob. Sorry, doggie. Boobie-biting is a no-no.
I have no children, and I have no pets that require toilet training. My advice? Start making Amy drink dog shat as punishment for not listening. Two birds with one stone, and all that! Good luck, and you’re welcome.
Cats last blog post..Attn: Complaint Department
Ah, you talking about Braden’s little Australian girlfriend really makes me feel so much better. I don’t wish it on you, but knowing someone else is *this* close to banging their fucking head against the wall is oddly comforting.
Yes to the fits/not listening/acting out/whining/SPITTING DRINKS (WTF is up with that!?)
Your plan(s) sound great. We’ve stepped up serious time-outs again, too. And he has to say he’s sorry at the end of his time-out now, too. Little stinker.
Sarcastic Moms last blog post..Oh, Hai! No, I’m not dead.
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