I keep starting to write posts and them reminding myself that actually, no, I’m not meant to be writing about that on the Internet. You see, I’ve taken some pain killers and it’s been a while since I took them, so I wasn’t sure if I would end up passing out, or just getting really stoned. This time, it appears that instead of passing out, I am inflicting myself and my weird feeling ears on the Internet.
You’re welcome.
I haven’t slept properly in a week. I keep passing out and them waking up with half of my joints where they’re not meant to be, then putting everything back in place, before passing out again. If you do this every hour, by the time your children wake up in the morning, you are not only exhausted, but you feel like you’ve been beaten by a baseball bat all night. This is how I’ve spent the last week.
Sure, I could blame the flu I have had (and I will) and I could blame the bed I have (and I will) and I could blame Nathan’s snoring (and I will), but really, it’s all the crappy joints, and the crappy problems that come with the crappy joints and I’m just a little bit over it.
Okay, I’m a lot over it.
I’ve been trying to work out why my shoulder was hurting and then I had a poke around in there to discover a dislocated collar bone. On top of dislocated ribs. And a hip that goes click-THUNK when I walk. Along with multiple other joints that have decided to rebel. I think my body wants a divorce from me, but I’m not quite sure where I would find the legal team to take on that nightmare.
Also, I’m pretty sure that none of this is making sense, but that is okay. You can blame the pills.
I was thinking about my pain management appointments and the fact that I’ve been handballed off to a psych, to get my anxiety issues sorted, before my physio will start to work with me again. I would have liked to handball my physio off to school, to learn more about EDS, before he could work with ME again, but it seems that you can’t demand that they do that.
Pity.
Of course, getting told I need to see a psych is the easy bit, the hard bit is actually getting my shit together to make the damn appointment (where did I write those numbers down?), making an appointment for some time that isn’t 2013 and then keeping my head together until I get there. Easier said than done, it feels.
And now that I’ve put this out onto the Internet, probably regretting it tomorrow when I wake up aching and ill, I’m going to disappear to try and read a book.
That is, if I can make my hands work properly.
This is a perfectly coherent post my darling girl and anyone that says otherwise will have to deal with my wrath.
I am sorry that your body is playing up so badly on you. And that physio needs a darn good slap. Arrogance mixed with ignorance is always a BAD combination.
🙁
I’m so sorry, V. I hope things settle down for you really soon.
Pretty rational to me Ron and spot on an]bout the physio. Psych’s are OK – I know a couple of very good ones.
After reading this I think you are totally allowed to vent to the world. How horrible to be in such pain constantly… And shame you cant handball the physio… Because I am sure THAT would have helped some!
So sorry your body is being such a bitch at the moment. I hope you get some relief soon. I offer up my arms of patheticness to slap your physio around for a while. Here’s wishing the pain meds give you some relief and your hands hold up long enough for you to read your book. (hugs)
Damn that sucks that your body is being so uncooperative right now :(.
I know a good counsellor if you need a name. She also does whole body stuff/ treating chronic illness. I trust her with my life. Sorry your body is being a shite. I shall send smiting thoughts at the evil physio.
I understood every word 🙂 Enjoy that book and happy thoughts for a good day tommorow.
Would it help at all to sleep with various braces on? I know it would be uncomfortable, but maybe it/they would hold things in place while you sleep?
You need a bookseat to hold your book for you, then all you need do is turn the page. Or hire a cute page turner. One who also serves tea/coffee/cake. And does laundry.
The internet exists for us to tell this stuff too. And it’s perfectly understandable as well as very eloquent. Big hugs.
It occurred to me while I was reading how much of a difference my tempur mattress makes to sleep and that we could perhaps run a similar fund raiser for you? BG Xx
Ok, you pop out of joint and it’s painful and traumatizing and you have these anxiety issues… I WONDER WHYYYYYY!!!! Duh. So now YOU have to get YOUR head together? Seriously? This is how medicine works in Australia? You-all seriously need to get some ranty posts together and change things for yourself like you did for Ivy.
Love and an ANGRY stomp of support from your friend in Missouri.
Perfectly coherent. I agree about what BendyGirl said. A Tempur would make a world of difference. Maybe try a fundraiser like she suggested? Hope you feel a bit better soon. =]
Oh honey. I hate that you’ve been having a crap time. I can relate to the not sleeping, I’m finding it really hard to get my body in a position that’s comfortable enough to grant me some sleep. There isn’t such a position in existence apparently. You know, pain docs are supposed to get that being in constant pain is hard on the brain, anxiety (in my experience) is a pretty natural product of that. Yet you’re treated like it’s some peculiar problem you have. They suck. Also, physios know everything about your body, it’s you who doesn’t get it. At least I think that’s what my Physio was trying to communicate to me. Don’t let them get you down, they just don’t understand, not unless they’ve lived it. xxxxxx
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