Gotta Laugh

Apologies to everyone who was on Facebook this morning.

by Veronica on February 9, 2013

in Evelyn, Gotta Laugh

Evelyn’s life is so hard. Her toys, they dangle in front of her and make her sad.

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But now! With the application of “Siblings” your baby can be as amused and entertained as mine!

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“Siblings” can greatly improve the mood of your baby. “Siblings” are highly recommended as an entertainment device.

Please be warned, after the warranty period has ended, “Siblings” may no longer be compatible. Issues such as “rivalry” and “hitting” are common. Manufacturers are working on a patch known as “time out”, but it has only been shown to work in a small amount of cases.

“Siblings” cannot be returned to their place of purchase. Once received “Siblings” are with you for life.

Get your baby some “Siblings” today!

This is not a sponsored post, although technically I received my “Siblings” for the low low price of nine months of vomiting and discomfort.

*Props to Natalie on the Sleepless Nights page for inspiring part of this post.

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Making myself accountable to you.

by Veronica on October 29, 2012

in Gotta Laugh, Headfuck

Wow, that sounds like a heavy title, doesn’t it? But it’s true – I am here today, making myself accountable to you.

Yes, you.

In a moment of insanity, I signed up to do NaNoWriMo. This is despite my crazy older children and the medical mystery baby –

[Who continues to not-seize and has added a whole range of new uncontrollable movements to her repertoire, leaving me thinking that “movement disorder” like the Neuro possibly thought, might just be on the money. Her hearing also appears to be sporadic now, and just, I don’t even KNOW with this baby.]

– and the wrapping up of the school year, and the beginning of spring and really, I have a million excuses as to why writing a novel right now is a terrible idea.

But I’ll always be able to find a million excuses for why sitting down Right Now is a bad idea, and instead, I’m not doing that. I’m looking at the one big reason that writing a novel Right Now is a great idea, and that’s because I’ll be joining an awful lot of other people trying to write 50k words in 30 days and we’ll all be insane together.

One of the ways that someone suggested to not fail, is to tell everyone that you’re doing it. Apparently, nothing will keep you writing faster than a fear of failing and everyone knowing about it. So in case you haven’t noticed, over there in my sidebar is a link to my page on the NaNoWriMo site, along with a wordcount widget.

Nothing appeals more to my obsessive nature than a wordcount widget telling the Universe how much I’ve written.

That’s it, really. I have a plan written, and an outline and I had a minor panic attack making my synopsis public (because people could be judging meeeeeeee).

If you’re joining in, let me know in the comments? Otherwise, feel free to tell me how insane I am.

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So, there I was, just minding my own business

by Veronica on August 28, 2012

in Gotta Laugh

I was minding my own business, standing in front of the fire with Evelyn on my shoulder, when with a bit of a shudder, she puked all over me. Down my back, on the hearth stones, running down my arm. You can tell she’s a third baby however, because I managed to catch it before it dripped into my cleavage.

I can’t say my reflexes were that great with the other two kids.

Puke catching: It’s a skill I’ve honed through the last six years of motherhood.

Where’s my medal?

A bit later, Isaac was sitting on the potty in the loungeroom, while I read blogs and held Evelyn upright (all the better to stop her throwing up anymore), when Isaac accidentally tipped his potty over and sort of fell off it.

Nope, I don’t quite know how he managed it either, he’s got skills, my boy. For the record, eucalyptus oil is a great cleaner.

It’s all bodily fluids and eye-gunk over here you guys. The trifecta of motherhood.

Yes, eye gunk. Amy has conjunctivitis and despite dripping breastmilk, chamomile tea AND antibiotic drops into her eyes, it’s getting worse, not better. School has been missed. A doctors appointment has been made. Lots of shrieking to “NOT TOUCH THE BABY” has occured.

It’s frankly awesome, this motherhood gig.

Isn’t it?

** I’m not really complaining.

 

 

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Internet, I have cabin fever

by Veronica on July 15, 2012

in Gotta Laugh

I can’t remember when I left the house last. First it was the pregnancy making it too hard to walk and then we caught the ‘flu and now my mental health is suffering badly.

But it’s okay! Because tomorrow I have an ultrasound to check on the growth of the baby, which means that I will be out of the house for a few hours at least, talking to real other adults in the real world. It shouldn’t excite me quite this much.

Speaking of this pregnancy, the baby is violent. I think she’s on a mission to take out my ribs and cervix, with my internal organs as collateral damage. I remember that the other two kicked hard and that occasionally it hurt, but I don’t remember them having the sheer strength of movement that this child does. I keep expecting her to burst free all alien style, leaving me broken and bleeding.

Needless to say, at 33 weeks pregnant, I am very much looking forward to being done. My internal muscles are bruised and my blood pressure keeps dropping out. It’s all a bit miserable. Worth it in the end, but utterly miserable right now.

Because I have cabin fever, this space is suffering a bit. I mean, I could tell you all about how Amy woke me up by throwing up on Isaac’s bed, or how Isaac isn’t sleeping much past 4am lately, but it’s just easier to read a book for a bit instead.

That said, Amy is declaring that she is goingto DIE if I don’t feed her breakfast IMMEDIATELY, which tells me that despite her ‘flu, her drama gene is still working nicely. I’m not feeding her cereal until she stops throwing up, so I guess I’ll have to take my chances with her drama.

In conclusion: My children are conspiring against me and my body is falling apart. Also, eventually I’ll remember how to blog regularly again.

 

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Birthdays and milestones and how long until August?

by Veronica on June 30, 2012

in Gotta Laugh, My body is broken., Pregnant. Finally.

There is a lot of whining in my house this morning. That is to be expected on a Saturday morning – my two spectrum-y children like the routine of school mornings and don’t cope as well when their only job is to watch cartoons and eat breakfast. I’ve already had an argument with Amy about why she needs to put clothes on, rather than spending the day curled in front of the fire wearing underpants, and Isaac, well, I’ve not managed to corral and dress him yet. Luckily the house is mostly warm. Ish.

My husband turns thirty tomorrow, which seems to me to be a rather large milestone in a mans life, but it still took him until yesterday to decide what he wanted to do. Would we go out for lunch? Would we invite his family up here? The vaccilitating between decisions seemed endless.

Being 31 weeks pregnant, I was pushing for everyone to visit here – as nice as it is to have someone cook lunch for me, the sheer exhaustion caused by having to leave the house and be upright wasn’t on my list of fun things to do. Last time I did that I required a few days in bed before I could walk again. My pelvis is not playing nicely and the rest of my joints have joined in the mutiny. August can not come fast enough.

The downside of everyone visiting here of course is that I am the one doing the cooking. Please don’t think that I am complaining, because I’m not. I’m merely mentioning that it’s not yet 10am and I have roast beef slow cooking in the oven (for sandwich and rice paper roll filling – also for our lunch today) and I’ve managed to marinate 2kg of chicken, despite the smallest child clinging to my leg the whole time.

If this keeps up, I’ll be ready for a nap just as everything is cooked.

I didn’t plan things terribly well and it wasn’t until after the beef was in the oven that I realised that I hadn’t had breakfast and now my oven was full of beef, not croissants.

Never mind, I didn’t feel like sharing the croissants with the children anyway.

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Slightly unrelated to anything: I’m quoted in The Punch today on Mummybloggers and the criticisms we receive. You want to read it, don’t you? Yes. Yes you do. CLICK HERE.

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How have you been Internet? Is there anything planned for you this weekend?

 

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