Evelyn gets a tooth. Also, I’m not really here.

by Veronica on May 30, 2013

in Blogging, Evelyn

You guys. I woke up this morning feeling like I’d been hit by a truck. The plague that struck down my children has hit me and I have headaches and chills and cold feet and a serious need for someone to pet me on the head and bring me chicken soup. Instead, I’m writing blog posts and articles for The Shake and trying to work out how Evelyn took a chunk out of my nipple.

Except it’s not really a mystery. She got A TOOTH. I know. Big news. My baby is now all nippy and toothy and I can’t let her gum on my fingers anymore for fear of having her break the skin and turn into a tiny little vampire. Or something. I’m a little feverish and probably not making any sense. BUT A TOOTH.

My baby is growing up.

009

LOOK AT HOW BIG THEY ARE.

In other news: I have been writing at The Shake, A LOT. Here’s some of my articles you might have missed and that I think you will enjoy.

Women are expected to be attractive. “As far as feminism has come, it seems that women are still expected to try and be attractive to others. From being asked by a man to smile (why do I owe you any sort of facial expression?) to the implied expectation that we all wear makeup, shave our bodies and have hair that looks normal.”

Rape Culture and our penchant for Victim Blaming. “I am a sitting here as a woman, existing in a world of rape culture and every bit of news reporting serves to show me how very unsafe I am. I am uncomfortably aware of how, to a percentage of people, my ownership of my own body can be overruled by the desire for someone else to see me used.”

How to raise engaged children. “I was an engaged child, growing up in the nineties. Of course, by “engaged” I mean, constantly engaged in chores and household work and activity, a fact which I bitterly resented when aged ten, I found myself standing down the bush throwing rocks at a tree angrily rather than collecting sticks.”

Female viagra will lead to crazed binges of infidelity; societal splintering. “Lock up your wives and daughters. Female “viagra” is set to cause widespread infidelity of unparalleled proportions. All those tired lines about female nymphomaniacs preying on the poor poor men are going to play out. No one will be able to stop the rampaging vaginas in the street as women tear off their clothes screaming “take me, take me now!””

 India declares dolphins to be “Non-Human Persons”. “Humans are arrogant, as a species. We’d like to think that we’ve got the jump on all other creatures; that our society is the most developed because we have science and technology. What if we’re wrong?”

Amongst other things. Wow. I have been writing a lot.

How are you?

river May 30, 2013 at 5:41 pm

A tooth!! Mine were all gummy and toothless until 10-11 months.
They have all got so big, at first I thought Amy was you….

I’ll have to get over to The Shake and do some catch-up reading. How many people write over there? Maybe I should set aside a whole month.

Veronica May 30, 2013 at 5:51 pm

We have a lot of writers, on a lot of topics. Around 20 regular contributors, with more coming on board, plus guest writers. It’s very exciting, and a lot of fun.

Sharon @ Funken Wagnel May 30, 2013 at 6:57 pm

I hope you feel better soon, and yay! A tooth

Oculus Mundi May 31, 2013 at 12:01 pm

Oh I was a write off last week, I should have had a leper bell around my neck. I couldn’t go to the doctors for blood tests cos I was too sick 😀 Do hope you feel much better very soon! Lovely picture too 🙂

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