For future record

Today, after a miserable night, I went searching through my blog archives. Long term readers know this, but I was hospitalised while pregnant with Isaac, with fears of preterm labour (short story: 24 weeks pregnant, lost mucus plug, positive fetal fibronectin test, steroids, antibiotics, 3 days in hospital for observation).

I knew that I was about this pregnant when it happened, but I couldn’t remember all of the details. You see, I’d bled on and off through the entire pregnancy to that point, so one more period of bleeding wasn’t entirely a memorable event. Only what happened afterwards is what sticks in my mind.

I’ve been having braxton hicks contractions for the last few weeks, but they’ve intensified in the last couple of days. No major cramping, they’re merely uncomfortable and not coupled with any bleeding, or true signs of labour.

As I was reading back through my archives, my blog was able to tell me that the braxton hicks contractions started at about the same time with Isaac’s pregnancy. That at 27 weeks they were uncomfortable and irregular. That he was still born full term, after two weeks of serious prelabour.

This is reassuring.

When people tell first time mothers to write everything down because they’ll forget, we scoff in disdain. What is happening to us is SO IMPORTANT that there is no way we’d forget any of it. Six years later I look back on Amy’s pregnancy to find myself hazy on the details. I know I was sick. I know the nausea came back with its friends, exhaustion and joint pain at about 22 weeks. I remember being incredibly miserable.

But I can’t remember the details like when braxton hicks contractions got uncomfortable and how badly my ribs ached when my uterus forced them to stretch.

It’s why I’m grateful that I blogged the pregnancy with Isaac, so that I can refer back to it this time.

So far, this pregnancy seems a perfect mix of both full term pregnancies I’ve had. The nausea, pain and exhaustion have increased in the last few weeks. The braxton hicks contractions are uncomfortable, but not a sign of anything greater. My ribs continue to ache and my skin is breaking out and I’m spending a lot of time laying on my bed with a book.

All in all, things look perfectly on track to finish in the same way I gestated and birthed Amy and Isaac.

While I’m nauseous and exhausted and crampy, knowing that this happened last time too (and the result of that pregnancy is draped over my lap right now, stroking my hair) is reassuring. I’m not going mad and I’m not going into preterm labour. I’m just not very good at pregnancy.

So I’ll follow the advice of my midwives from previous pregnancies. I will make sure I’m only doing light things around the house. I will rest lots and I will eat good food as often as I can. I will medicate as necessary and I will drink as much water as I can hold without audibly sloshing.

And, it should all be okay.