What defines a mummyblogger?

Call me a mommy blogger, a mummy blogger, a mum who blogs, call me whatever you want, just don’t call me late for dinner.

Seriously, I don’t mind. I blog about my kids, studies, work (not so much actually, not keen on getting sacked), anything that takes my fancy. I suppose if I was really serious about blogging for money, then I would pick a more specific niche and stick to it, but I do this because it keeps me sane.

When the kids are out of the house and have kids of their own, I might become a grammy blogger or I might run out of material and put away my laptop. It doesn’t seem likely somehow. I love it too much.

Sorry, this probably didn’t help.

from an outsider’s point of view, I know I’ve landed on a mummy blogger page when it seems pretty clear that it’s entirely kid-centric. If there’s ‘mummy’ ‘mum’ ‘mama’ in the title, it’s a dead give away. In extreme cases, it’s when it seems the blogger sees being a mum as their core identity. I know plenty of mums who just see their mothering as one aspect of their lives and have plenty of other defining attributes, but mummy bloggers are another kettle of fish entirely.

Disclaimer: no judgement intended. Just reflection and observation.

I am a mummy blogger. I sometimes write about my kids. I write mummy blogger pieces about my kids. I also write pieces that have no mention of my kids but I’m still a mummy blogger. Motherhood is not all that I am but it is the most important part of who I am. Since becoming a mum, everything else I do has changed. I think about my kids in everything I do. I do things for myself also, of course. But that’s because a happy mum makes a happy home. I am far from the cookie baking, homeschooling mummy blogger type but I am still a mummy blogger and not afraid or ashamed of the title. My interests lie mainly in all things parenting and writing. I can understand why some people may have felt out of place at a conference made up of mainly mummy bloggers. But some people feel out of place wherever they are and like to whinge about everything that doesn’t fit them perfectly. Maybe I would feel the same at a conference of mainly food bloggers. I don’t know. I’m a bit over the negativity around the place.

I like to think that I am both a mummyblogger and a personal blogger. I don’t feel that they are mutually exclusive. There are times when much of my blog is about my kids and there are times (like at the moment) when there are other such weighty things happening in my life that, while I still think about my kids constantly and consider them in everything I do, I need to write about other things for myself.

I think that many women use their blogs as a way of recording the wonderful day to day interactions they have with their kids that they might otherwise forget over time. I don’t think that this means that these women define themselves as only mothers, just that the focus of their blog tends to be about their relationships with their children and the magic that is watching a child grow and change.

Having said that, I don’t think I’ve ever come across a blog where a woman with children writes exclusively about them, without giving the reader all sorts of amazing insights into who she is as a person.

I have to say that I tend to think the label is irrelevant, if someone wanted to call me a Mummyblogger (while it’s not how I would define myself most of the time) I think I would also feel a bit of a sense of pride that I am part of a movement that celebrates motherhood and gives women a forum to be open and honest about what motherhood really means. I know it’s been tremendously empowering for me to be a part of.

I’m going to be honest and upfront.

I think it’s a valid question and a very good one – something that I have been thinking about for a while.

I don’t like the term “mummyblogger” for myself (perhaps this is something I should get over, I don’t know) simply because I don’t like the connotations that come with it.

In my mind it is closely linked with advertising and PR and, as we know, I don’t have any interest in that kind of thing on my personal blog. I do immediately think of US mommyblogging too and I guess that illicits some reaction deep down inside myself as we all know how much of a powerful engine that is. To me it seems so revenue and networking based. And hierarchical.

The truth is that I whislt I do of course love my kids, my blog has really nothing to do with them. Of course I sometimes may talk about them (just like I do my cats, but I am not a cat-blogger), but I always consider me to be myself before I consider myself to be a mother.

I guess, what I am therefore saying, is that I resent the fact that I may be viewed as a mother (nb: not that there is anything wrong with that) before I may be viewed as me (which I would prefer).

I am willing to admit that this stems from deep issues I have with still trying to clutch onto my own individuality after having children. To me, the term ‘mummy blogger’ strips this from me again. And that’s why I dont like it.

I dont need to add a disclaimer do I? This is just how I feel.
If you feel differently, that is fine.

I see THIS blog of yours as part mummy blog, because a lot of what you write is kid related. However, that’s like saying I’m a food blogger – I write plenty of food posts, but ther are others, is that okay?

A “true” Mummyblog to me is full of photos of the kids, silly storys and the like. You, and people like Tiff, go a bit deeper than that, so it’s less mummyblogging and more personal blogging.

Yeah.

Hmm.

I think that as being a “mummy” has so little value in our society that being a “mummy blogger” can attract those same feeling of not “having a real job” like being a “real” writer.

My blog is absolutely a “mummy blog” and I’m comfortable with that 🙂

You know what, I wouldn’t worry about what label you are, instead just write. Since the conference I’ve spoken to a lot of people who felt they should focus on their blog more. Wondering are they doing things the ‘right’ way? Should they be promoting themselves more? etc, etc. I think if we get caught up in these things blogging loses a lot of its enjoyment and the essence of why we started blogging in the first place.

I get put in the category of mummy blogger, but I write more about myself and my thoughts and feelings than about parenting or being a mum. I don’t tend to think about it that much, I just write about what’s in my head.

Good observations from all those above me. I think titles are irrelevant; bloggers are bloggers, what they write about will change over time, just as you are finding now, with writing less about Amy and Isaac. I’ve no idea how I would define my own blog with a title, it’s such a mish-mash of posts. It’s just me spilling out whatever pops into my head, most posts aren’t planned in advance, although a few are, Sunday Selections for example, and the ones I wrote about the conference, (which were really more about my Sydney Holiday).
So I’m not a mummy blogger, not a photo blogger, not a specific niche blogger; I’m just a blogger.

I think you blog about the things that are important to you, EDS, autism, the ducks, silly interfamily dramas (fun!), gluten free stuff and of course your children as well.

I don’t define you except to say that I count you as one of my friends. 🙂

Hmm, interesting post and it’s taken me about half an hour to read all the comments!!

I don’t know what sort of blogger I am. A bit of a rubbish one probably! I’m currently a 365er and I mostly post about my kids so I guess that makes me a mummyblogger but I don’t really think about it all that much.

I know what sort of blogger you are though. A bloody brilliant one.

This is all VERY interesting. Veronica, the best conversations go on here, on your blog!
I don’t call myself a mummy blogger, for a number of reasons.
My kids are older, and I have to respect their privacy (one of my kids is 28 this year!)
Also, though I have little kids, I’m so out of the whole baby/toddler scene now that I feel irrelevant. I’m a granma, and I’m careful about not seeming to give too much advice or ‘over-share’ with my DILs, so I can’t imagine trying to join in on blog conversations about babies and toddlers.
And I think MOST mummybloggers start to write more about other stuff once their kids are in school (so it seems to me, anyway) so most of the mummyblogs that I read are baby/toddler oriented.
Don’t get me wrong! I have the utmost respect for mummybloggers! You’re amazing, and the sense of community is vital, esp for mums who are struggling or find their kids have a problem. Even more so given the fairly fractured society we live in today.
I call myself a life blogger. My tagline is “the stuff I might tell you over coffee” – and some of that is about being a mum, but not enough to define me as such.
I think also that definitions do have an impact on our blogs.
I don’t read fashion blogs, for example. Someone who isn’t a mum and isn’t intending to be a mum probably isn’t going to read a mummyblog unless they know the author.
Like it or not, I think we are, to a degree, defined by our blogs’ subject matter.

Phew! Finally at the end, after resisting the urge to comment on the comments!

I have been struggling with this myself, and am in the process of writing a post on it. To be honest, I have never felt all that comfortable with the term Mummy Blogger, to me it sums up connotations of being patronised. It does not sit well with me. It seems, to me, to devalue what blogging is all about. It seems to me to bring with it a certain amount of degrading and devaluing. This is my issue, I realise, and other people feel very differently.

I know other people have embraced it, claimed it as their own, but it’s not for me. I almost didn’t join AMB because of it. To me the word ‘mummy’ means younger children. I blog about lots of things, sometimes that includes my kids, but not always. I don’t often get called Mummy by my children, so why would I be called mummy in relation to my blog?

Do I know where I fit? No. Does it really matter… I’m not sure. I know many of the blogs I read are written by mothers, but are they what I would call Mummy Blogs? Some I suppose are, but they offer me something other than just what goes on in the lives of their children.

It’s a difficult question, and it’s one that has no clear answer. It’s one I really struggle with though, as Kirrily said, the closest I have come for myself is personal blogger, but that does not seem right really either. Writer blogger? Sometimes… not always, so I just don’t know.
But this discussion is fascinating!

For me, having a label keeps me a little bit focussed. I’ve built up a really great community over the years with great readers, many of whom I also read. I feel like to keep them with me, I want to keep within a certain style and feel. If i was to suddenly start writing an awful lot on something obscure and probably meaningful only to me, I might not engage them as much, although over time I’ve branched about a bit and that seems to have worked.

Mainly, i want to remain a knitting focussed blogger who makes forays into personal blogging and so keeping a label (or a style, is probably more accurate) means I’m going along with what has worked, and continues to work. I’ve seen bloggers in a niche just go off the rails into unfocussed and rambling territory and it’s a surefire way to kill off your readership.

That said, i don’t want to be bound entirely by what I’ve set up. I don’t want my readers to dictate what I write – and they don’t – but I try to keep a narrow focus because that’s the way I like it.

100 comments! I have read a fair few of them. As ever agree with Rusty Hoe entirely.

I feel a little outside the whole thing being from the UK. But no matter. When I started blogging I just did it. BendyGirl suggested I took a look at hers and after a while I tentatively started. Mainly I began to have an outlet to have a space of my own to moan and groan about living with a diagnosis of ehlers danlos.

Sometimes I moan a lot, I don’t think about posts in my head at all. I just open the laptop and write stuff. I could write more about my kids although they are not little anymore! Easily as my blog is anonymous. If anyone knew me outside of the blogosphere they would easily be able to identify me. Thus far this has not happened. I am a mother, woman, wife, individual, so I just write about this and that. I think had blogging existed when my kids were little I would possibly have loved to join in the whole mummy blogging thing. Still retaining my individuality, probably because throughout my life, I have always felt somewhat on the ‘outside’ of things looking in.

I like Rusty Hoe, write about my health, but I don’t think that defines me and I am wary of labels. Mostly because I would struggle so hard to stay on topic. I cannot abide, highly stylised blogs, which seem to be written to impress. I prefer the blog that is written with spontanaeity (sp) and with verity and probity.

I wonder in part your worrying about blog identity has been triggered by the family upset thing. Veronica, I like your blog whatever you write about. As the children get older it is natural that you will become more conscious of their right to privacy. This doesn’t mean you cannot write about autism, asperger’s, eds, development etc. I think you are finding a way of writing that includes these aspects without necessarily being specific about which child does what …..

I think as the conference stuff evolves so will the naming. Over time and retrospectively some things will work and some won’t. The labels don’t matter.

You are you. Write about whatever you want as long as it comes naturally. I think you are blogging fantastic but have a tendency to worry too much.
xoxoxoxoxo

You know, until recently, I didn’t realise “Mummy Blogger” was such a detested thing to many. That was a shock. And it’s interesting that while my blog would absolutely be a “Mummy Blog” I never saw it that way–maybe because I was quite oblivious (wish I still was in a way). You see, I talk about kids stuff, and Mum stuff, and personal stuff…that is what the blog is about but I don’t really just talk about what I did that day or what concert I went to see (not that there is anything wrong with that either!).

If I had to decide what to call myself I wouldn’t be a “Mummy Blogger” I’d be a “Blog for Mums”. My blog is a blog like any other blog. The topic is motherhood. I really don’t see why this is much different than a “craft” blog or a “tech” blog…the only thing that is different is the topic. They are all blogs….presumably built on the interest of the author. I’m about to start another “Non-Mummy” blog too…so what will that then make me…A Mummy Blogger and a Blogger? NO! I’m a blogger. That’s it. And I blog about what interests me in a way that I hope will connect to many people. To me, that is what blogging is all about.

So yeah, I totally get where you are coming from because after being “enlightened” about how people view “Mummy Bloggers” it’s been something I’ve had to process in my own mind.

I’d like to point out that I have eye strain from thirty minutes of solid comment reading without blinking. Now I’ll get on with what I think:
I’m a Mummy Blogger (I use capital letters every time) and have been from the get go because my blog started as a pregnancy diary of sorts because I suddenly had this extra time on my hands and the overwhelming hormonal urge to whinge a bit.
I do predominantly write about my son because my days are currently filled with child-focused activities… if something else catches my interest then I write about that too.
In regards to the conference I found a lot of people I spoke to were extremely shy, particularly the ones who felt they were ‘smaller’ than others. Because there was only 3 people there who had ever seen me before I felt I was in the same boat as them. I found that a lot of the ‘bigger’ Bloggers had a lot more people wanting to meet them in a small amount of time and as a result it was easy to feel ignored, even though I don’t believe they were actually ignoring me.
I have no idea if any of that makes sense, but I’m too tired to read back over it.

I’ll tell you what I think is funny about all this – all this worrying about derision aimed at the Mummy Blogger niche is not particular to Mummy Bloggers you know. Belonging to any niche is an invitation to be sneered at. I don’t do it often but if I out myself as a knitting blogger to people who a)don’t knit and b)don’t blog it’s a sure fire way to either get them to change the subject or to laugh at me.

“You blog about knitting? What is there to say? Who else would read such thing? Oh how quaint! Is it like a journal of things you make? That’s so sweet/cute/silly.’

Or worse still, some hard core feminists, who I thought I shared core values with, had a go at me about not making proper use of my time. ‘Shouldn’t you be out there doing something meaningful with your life instead of sitting at home knitting like a 50s housewife?’

So you know, we can all be sneered at by anyone. I never let that get in the way of doing what I love best. Blogging about my creative life and most importantly, actually knitting and being creative.