Sleepless Nights

Author: Veronica

  • Sunday TMI

    So today is Tuesday, but I don’t want to talk about today. I want to talk about Sunday.

    Sunday I had lots of plans. Do some laundry, make some bread, clean up a little, enlist Nathan to do a bunch of stuff. You know, normal weekend stuff.

    What I did not want to do was pass a small blood clot and bleed a little. Now in the interest of full disclosure, it wasn’t fresh blood, more of a browny sludge (you can thank me later).

    So I did what any pregnant women does. I panicked a little, then I rang my hospital for advice. Said advice being, ‘We’re really sorry that you live an hour away, but we DO need to see you. Can you come in?’

    And being Sunday, of course I could come in, because Nathan was home and Mum was available to watch Amy.

    24 weeks and spotting.

    One vaginal exam and an ultrasound later, they had no idea where the bleeding was coming from, or what might be causing it. They said ‘Another doctor will be around to talk to you soon’.

    They lied.

    Soon for me, is in the next 30 minutes maybe 45 if they are busy. Soon is NOT nearly 3 hours later.

    And 3 hours later would have been okay, if the doctor would have actually been able to tell me something. Or at least apologize for soon not actually being soon.

    Diagnosis – No idea. Go home. And he was rude about it.

    Firstly he was Indian, which, fine. He’s Indian, it’s not going to affect how he does his job. He spoke good English and yada yada yada.

    However.

    He did not UNDERSTAND English very well. Our whole conversation was him telling me what I was meant to do, me asking him to clarify and him completely misunderstanding me and talking me in a whole big circle again.

    He could not tell me why I was spotting. He could not tell me the results of the swab they took, nor the urine test. He refused to answer all questions as to why I might be bleeding instead answering with a ‘well the ultrasound looks normal, so we think everything is fine’. He couldn’t tell me if I had an infection (a possibility bandied around while I was in the awkward position of having my ankles together and my knees apart wearing no pants).

    He asked me where I lived.

    ‘About an hour out of Town in *insert suburb here*’

    ‘Is that towards Launceston? Or down south?’

    ‘No, towards Launceston’

    ‘Well why are you here then? Why aren’t you being seen at Launceston General?’

    ‘Because this hospital is closer?’

    ‘But why you not go to Launceston instead? Or another Hospital closer?’

    ‘Because this is the closest hospital! This is the ONLY hospital within a 100km radius’

    (You arrogant idiot! Why else do you think I would travel an hour ON A SUNDAY to be checked out!)

    ‘Oh’

    (If you didn’t find him telling me to go to another hospital ironically hilarious, it’s because I have never mentioned how bad the funding for our health system is at the moment. All the smaller health clinics and hospitals have been closed. And even if they were still operating? Hobart is still closer than ANY of them! AND none of them are equipped to birth babies.)

    He gave me an order for blood tests and told me I had to get them done before my next appointment with the midwives. Then he contradicted himself a bunch of times until I had no fucking idea what I was meant to do with the blood tests.

    Further examination of the order has shown that they are stock standard 26 week blood tests that will be drawn at my next appointment. They do not require a special trip into town and they are not testing for why I might be bleeding. Asshole.

    According to an ultrasound, the baby is fine and my placenta is fine. No obvious cause of any bleeding.

    I have been given orders to return if I feel the need (fat fucking chance. I will go back if I am in active labour, or if I am bleeding red.) or to call for reassurance.

    I felt like I was treated badly by the doctors. The first doctor who did the exam and ultrasound, asked my age and then told me how ‘very very young’ I was. Quite a few times. Then she said ‘And you have a 2 year old at home? Goodness you are YOUNG’.

    Yes lady, I know I am young. I don’t feel young. I made the conscious decision to have my children NOW rather than when I am 35. This is what works for us. We own our own home, I write on the Internet (for small amounts of money) and I planned my life this way. My pregnancies were not accidental.

    Back the fuck off.

    I left stressed and upset, feeling like I hadn’t been listened to. All I wanted to know is WHY I was bleeding and what might have been causing it. Failing that, a decent consolation that no, everything is fine and none of this will affect your baby would have worked for me.

    Anything except what I got.

    I do need to mention the Midwives at my hospital though. The lady who was there for my exam, did the Doppler for a heartbeat and showed me where the coffee and tea making stuff was, she was lovely. So absolutely lovely. Thank you to her.

    So today is now Tuesday and I have very light pink staining. I get crampy when I stand up for more than 5 minutes and I am spending more time stressing than I reasonably should. The good thing is, any contractions I might have are still Braxton Hicks and while uncomfortable, aren’t painful.

    Sigh.

    So, that’s what’s been up with me. How are you?

  • Chocolate Choc-Chip Biscuits

    Okay, so I’m being lazy today. Mainly because last post? When I said the nausea had gone? I advise all pregnant women to NOT TELL ANYONE if your nausea goes away because Karma is a bitch.

    Ugh.

    So anyway, here is my best cure; not for morning sickness; but for that chocolate craving you may or may not be suddenly struck down with.

    The Easiest Chocolate Choc-Chip Biscuits Ever

    1/2 cup of butter
    1/3 cup sugar
    1/3 cup brown sugar (I didn’t have either white sugar or brown, so I used 2/3 cup of raw sugar and it worked fine)
    1/2 tspn vanilla essence
    1 egg, beaten
    1 2/3 cups self raising flour
    2 tbsns cocoa powder
    1/2 cup chocolate chips.

    Method:

    Grease 2 oven trays and preheat oven to 180C (350F)

    Cream the butter and sugar until light and fluffy, gradually add the beaten egg and continue beating. Add the vanilla, chocolate chips and cocoa. Mix to combine.

    Add the flour a little (or, if you are lazy like me, a lot) at a time. Continue mixing until everything is combined.

    Shape teaspoonfulls of mix into balls and place on tray. Leave enough room for spreading and no, they don’t need squashing prior to going in the oven.

    Bake for 10-12 minutes. They will still be soft when you pull them out of the oven, don’t worry, they harden up once they start to cool. Eating them still warm is half the fun though.

    Mmmmmmm.

    If you just want regular choc-chip buscuits, you can emit the cocoa and use an extra 2 tbsns of flour instead.

    Or you could emit the choc-chips for plain chocolate biscuits.

    Whatever you do, this is the easiest and best biscuit recipe ever.

    And uh, I would have taken photos for you, but I made these yesterday and I don’t seem to have any left to photograph. Sorry.

  • 24 weeks.

    Well here I am at 24 weeks.

    The baby still feels like he is breech and he spends alot of time kicking me in the bladder. Sigh. My boobs are leaky (man, I had forgotten how annoying leaky boobs are) and sore.

    I feel stretched and my tummy itches an awful lot. I have less room in my lungs and I am just about at the point where I can’t put washing in the washing machine, or get it out. (Front load washing machine, sitting on the ground. Not the best place for a pregnant woman).

    So far, aside from the occasional ‘Mmm, that would be nice right now’ I haven’t had hardly any cravings whatsoever, unless you count the craving for Amy to not need to sit on my belly. No midnight need for chocolate pudding, or dashes to the supermarket to procure pickles. Maybe it’s because I don’t really like pickles all that much anyway.

    However the nausea that had been plaguing me? Is mostly gone. I just have to remember to eat small meals often and head to bed before 9pm (lack of sleep makes my nausea terrible) and it is mostly controlable. So much nicer to be actually able to eat! Fingers crossed that I can keep it at bay for the rest of this pregnancy.

    Weirdest thing ever? I have been finding myself needing to snack on something (anything!) at 2am. I wake up hungry and can’t fall back asleep until I eat something. Foods of choice lately have been pears, apples or bread and cheese. Once I have eaten I fall back asleep without any hassles. Not sure what I can do to stop needing midnight snacks, but apparently eating right before bedtime doesn’t help me.

    Not long to go now. I suspect that the 16 weeks are probably going to fly. It’s funny too, even when I am tired and sore and complaining that pregnancy sucks, I am still so happy – so LUCKY – to be here. Feeling the baby hiccup and wiggle, well that’s just awesome. I can’t wait to be done, but today? Right now? It doesn’t suck so much.

  • For Sale or Trade

    For Sale or Trade:

    One toddler. Slightly snot encrusted, but in a much better mood than yesterday. Is currently running, jumping, leaping and shouting BOO! at me. Can stand on one foot, hop, count, sing (tonelessly) and talk. Also gives good cuddles, declares ‘I LOVE you!’ occasionally and will accept any and all kisses.

    Hates having her hair brushed, having me wash her face (hence the snot encrustation), raw pumpkin and being told no.

    Is still mostly incapable of sleeping through the night, although occasionally she will sleep through for 3 nights and then wake up every hour for a month.

    Likes any and all food (except raw pumpkin) olives and cheese especially, feeding herself, reading books all by herself, stealing any and all food from my plate. Loves being outside, kissing Daddy and climbing (onto the bench/table specifically).  Is a good problem solver and will move objects so that she can climb/destroy/wreck-rend things properly. Will play with something only until she figures out how it works, then throw it away.

    Be careful, she can open lids of things.

    For Sale or Trade:

    One 6 month old puppy.

    Chews things. Alot. Has a penchant for toddler shoes and women’s underwear (both stolen from the washing pile and clean). Barks only occasionally and is generally quiet.

    Has shown lots of talent in the garden digging area, so if you need a digging dog, she would be perfect. Digs up pea seedlings in order to eat them. Eats everything, so is a little tubby due to living on a Toddler diet.

    Insists on chasing and chewing on the cats, much to my annoyance at 2am. As much as she bashes them though, I caught her curled up asleep with the Tortoiseshell kitten this morning. Heh.

    Is good with toddlers, randomly cleaning faces and playing. Doesn’t seem to like snot much though, probably a good thing.

    For Sale or Trade:

    2 Kittens.

    Mostly grown, one tortoishelle and one tabby. Have no names aside from The Tortoiseshell and The Tabby. Both can catch birds, mice, frogs and lizards, although I try and discourage frog and lizard catching.

    In fact, I can hear frenzied bird squeaking right now. Oh no wait, that’s okay, it’s gone quiet. I don’t suppose I will have to feed them now.

    They don’t eat much and they cope well with puppy chewing and toddlerness. Will however eat any and all table scraps (including peas and carrots) if allowed. Continuously surprise me by not getting fat (like the dog).

    They don’t eat my underwear or scratch or miaow.

    Although, one of them is living in my roof of a night time (does anyone want their own personal roof cat?).

    Generally unaffectionate and a little skittish.

    ****

    For the toddler, I want at least her weight in chocolate and you can only borrow her. For an hour.

    For the Cats, well they are worth their weight in gold with the lack of mice I have had lately. So gold offers only.

    And for the puppy? Well at the moment I am willing to accept any offer. She’s giving me the shits.

  • Sick

    Amy is sick.

    Which would be very sad, was it not for the fact that she is so damn adorable when she is sick (aside from the copious amounts of snot and whining).

    She needs a blanket. But not any blanket, no, she needs one of the wraps that we were given for the new baby. She needs to snuggle under one wrap, with another draped over her head for hiding under when the snot gets too much.

    She wants oranges. But not to eat, no, she just wants me to peel and segment them so she can hold them while she hides under the blankets.

    She needs a book. Banana’s in Pajama’s is good, as is any of the books from ‘In The Night Garden’ or her Bedtime Stories book. None of her other 1000 books will do. Not today.

    She needs to be sitting next to me, but I’m not allowed to touch her blankets. The world will end if I touch them, unless she specifically crawls into my lap with them. The world will also end if I actually move from sitting next to her. Or out of sight.

    She is so cute, even with a face full of snot and swollen weepy eyes.

    Poor little pet.

    **Updated:

    She is now very sadly telling me that ‘Daddy is at work…sigh’ and requesting pumpkin soup. Weran out of pumpkin soup 2 days ago (I had made a big pot of it).

    I’m thinking that this might get very old very soon. Cross fingers I can hold onto the cute and my sanity.

    ***

    Oh and if you are that way inclined, you can win a handbag over at Handbag Planet. They are giving away one handbag an hour for their launch and honestly? I am not a handbag girl, but these are nice bags. You can enter here.