Okay, so here is the deal. I want to start doing a ‘thing’ where I’ll talk about something and you can all chime in with as much advice as you like. Normally mothers get annoyed about unsolicited advice, but this time, I’m asking for help.
Also, I will be about in the comments, so if you want to ask something and have people chime in, even if it’s just to say ‘my kid did that too and grew out of it’ then please, do so. We’ve got a community built here, we may as well utilise it.
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Now, on to my issue:
Isaac, he doesn’t swallow food. I feed him and he chews the food, but doesn’t swallow, just spits it out again once it’s chewed.
If I give him pureed or mashed food, he might swallow a mouthful maybe, before he realises that I’ve deposited it in his mouth, but mostly, he’ll spit it into his hand and try to feed it to me. Failing that, he’ll just drop it. He’s not a fan of spoon food.
If I feed him finger food, which is his preference, he chews it and then spits it out without swallowing. I can give him half an apple and come back and the apple will be gone, but really, the apple is sitting in a giant circle of chewed pieces around him.
Peas, well, he’ll eat a few peas, before chewing and spitting the rest. The same for most of his other vegetables. Actually, considering I don’t count the peas, he is probably just chewing and spitting all of them. I haven’t seen any come out the other end.
He will eat soft fruit: cantaloupe, watermelon, pears, nectarines. He won’t eat the skin of nectarines or pears and once he gets near the skin he starts spitting. If I peel them first, he still mostly spits the food out.
He will drink milk or water from a bottle or a sippy cup. He is down to 1-2 breastfeeds a day and as of right now, I haven’t breastfed him for 15 hours and I’m not likely to feed him again for another 12 or so hours.
He doesn’t appear to be losing weight, but I don’t have any scales here to check if he is gaining weight either.
He is drinking a full bottle at bedtime and naptime, but I know he is hungry when I give him solid food to eat, so it’s not a hunger issue that I can see.
Oh and he is just over 12 months old.
My questions:
Does anyone else’s child do this?
Does anyone have any good ideas that I can try, to get him to start swallowing the food?
And, to my readers with experience in Ehlers Danlos Syndrome – do you think this could be EDS related? We don’t have another specialist Paeds appointment for another five months, but if he continues to not swallow, I’m prepared to push for an earlier appointment.
Finally: Does anyone else have any questions they want answers to about kids and food? If so, leave them in the comments section. Commenters, read the comments, someone might be dealing with your exact same issue. This might work really well, or it might flop. Frankly, if it helps me get Isaac actually swallowing solid food, then I don’t care.
Kids! Sheesh, but they’re stressful.
Well, I don’t have any good advice I’m afraid, Max is 2 and a quarter and has only just started eating more normally, and I use that term very loosely!
Max never let me spoon feed him – EVER. He’d scream and purse his lips (somehow at the same time!), shaking his head and refusing to let me near him with any sort of food. He’s still like that now, only instead of crying he giggles – it’s become a game I suppose?
As a result of that I had no choice but to go down the “baby led weaning” route, however he has a huge aversion for anything that is remotely wet or slimy. Bananas – no chance, pasta – no way! Basically he will only eat things that are dry to the touch. Toast, chicken nuggets, dry cereal etc. It’s still a struggle now for him to get enough to eat. However he seems to be putting on weight normally!
As for the milk… a whole other problem with that. He will *only* drink milk, and *only* from a bottle. I have tried both water/juice in his bottle, and milk in a sippy cup, but he refuses point blank to have anything other than milk from his bottles. I’m at a loss!
The problem is, I can’t bribe him or anything because of his lack of communication. He doesnt speak – at all. Not even to call me mummy or ask for milk. So I can’t explain to him about how to use the sippy cups, or that the slimy food is actually really tasty. I’m at a loss!
Sorry for taking over the post in comments Veronica, but you did ask for it! š
Yep, twas the point of this exercise, to take it over!
I forgot to mention – Isaac will eat bananas. It’s probably the only thing he eats most of with very little mess. They do make him rather constipated though, so it’s having to weigh up what is best. Sigh.
@ Marylin, Einstein didn’t talk until he was eight.
Woodjie is brilliant, then, because he is three and still hasn’t said “Mama.”
Marilyn, I hope you don’t think I’m nosy… but my son Emperor is still that way at eight and while he doesn’t have a diagnosis (I haven’t pursued one), he does have three autistic brothers. He eats mostly crackers. He has moved up to sandwiches and smoked sausages, but they have to be “crispy” sausages.
I think I’m a realllly lax mom, but there are so many other things to fight about (unfortunately!!). If the child is eating enough I wouldn’t worry too much. But Veronica, I would push for an earlier appointment, or at least a GP checkup on the scales. Then if Isaac suddenly eats a ton you can cancel the appointment. š
Whoops, sorry I spelt your name incorrectly, MARYLIN.
I did this as a baby/small child…and hate to tell you this, but I still do it now. Gross but I’ve yakked mouthfuls of toast back into my hand this morning and handed the rest over to Bendycat. I’m working myself up to start on something else as once I’ve swallowed solids its usually easier to get back into a ‘normal’ eating pattern.
I *think* but it’s just my theory that this is something to do with laxity. I can now correlate it to my bendiest times of the month, or if I go too long without eating. I end up too floppy internally to manage to chew and swallow properly. Chewing is ok, but I just can’t make the food go down. Probably similar to the times I’m so floppy my throat or airway is affected, after all those are structures held in place by ‘rings’ of collagen and in us…
Only practical advice (as this wasn’t dealt with in my childhood) is keep food really, really frequent. It’s almost as though our bodies need something solid to keep the digestive system where it should be/doing what it should. Soft stuff is good…he’s probably just not out of baby laxity enough yet to get the control of his digestive system he needs. I go for soups, mashed potato (that works really well, mix a bit of gravy in for protein) oh, and I’m currently obsessed with Bovril. In liquid form so swallowable but gets enough liquid/calories in to kick start the digestive system again.
Good luck with this and hope it improves soon, BG Xx
I don’t know about the EDS and it’s very difficult to offer much advice without being able to actually see what he is doing but it does sound like there may be an issue with oral motor strength/control/coordination. I would recommend seeing a Speech Path for a feeding assessment if you feel he begins to lose weight or is not growing as you would like. Otherwise it sounds as though you are offering a range of textures, which is good – how does he go with firmer foods like crackers? Also, what about yoghurt – a set yoghurt, not a runny one? Hmmm. As I said, I would need to see! There are some activities you could try with him to improve things, I could probably email you some if you are interested.
Also, Kim, I think that Einstein thing is a myth!
Hmmm….. I have no idea what to suggest, sorry. I have one who will eat anything and one who is a bit more of an “inspector” (ie: must remove new foods from mouth, inspect them and decide if it’s ok to eat or not).
I’m not very well versed in EDS so I dont know how it could be affecting things š I would just hope that if he is hungry, he will eat? Well, lets hope so anyway.
I don’t know why Isaac is chewing and spitting but it doesn’t sound like too much of a swallow problem if he can swallow his milk and eat bananas. I have had a few children in my care who were very slow to cope with ‘lumpy’ food and would chew and spit like Isaac. It was just a case of perseverance and continuing to offer a variety of textures and flavours. A certain amount of calorific value will be going through his system even though much of the food is spat out. I would suggest getting a set of scales and weighing Isaac daily to see what is happening so you can be sure that he isn’t losing ground. If you can arrange to have his throat checked out for any obvious problem that would be good too.
From the photos we have seen he does seem to be thriving so, unless his weight is dropping or he shows signs of distress or lethargy, I don’t think you need to worry too much about this at the moment.
PS. My younger son wasn’t too keen on food but would drink pints of milk. In his case it was more a ‘time and motion’ problem – took too much time to eat when he’d rather be in motion š
Reminds me of a sensory issue…
I’d push for an earlier appointment. At the Children’s Hospital here in Denver, they have a service called Occupational Therapy where they work with kids on things like that.
My daughter is a picky eater, too, and I spent many pediatrician visits grilling her poor doctor about whether or not she was ok. The thing that I learned is that as long as they are healthy and gaining weight appropriately for their age, they will usually outgrow all their little dietary quirks if you are persistent. That said, IF Isaac is underweight for his age, or not gaining weight according to those growth charts, I would consider doing something about it. Here in the States, they have meal replacement drinks for kids called Pediasure. Since they are somewhat expensive, I usually recommend that people use a cheaper version called Carnation Instant Breakfast, which can be mixed with milk. I don’t know if you have these things in Tasmania, but you probably have something similar. I would start introducing it in his bottles (gradually — start with mostly milk and just a little Pediasure, and then every day use less milk and more Pediasure until he’s used to the taste). They will be helpful in at least getting some vitamins and minerals into his diet in the meantime.
I would also consider getting him into Occupational and Speech Therapy. It sounds as if he has a type of oral aversion, and while it may be just a quirk that he outgrows, if it IS more serious, NOW is the time to work on it, while he is still young and learning.
Good luck to you!!
None of that over here, but it sounds like it might be a sensory issue. Will he do yogurt or anything like that?
Is he gagging at all on the different textures? Or has he in the past, thus creating an aversion? Like someone above, it could be a sensory issue, and a feeding clinic might be helpful. (I’m a speechie, but…) Paed feeding is so not my area – I haven’t done any of it since I was a new grad, but yes, seeing a speech pathologist would probably be useful. We prefer in the ACT that you see the MACH nurse first, but it’s not essential.
Well, it could be one of two things. One, he’s just exercising his new found ability to exercise control. He may just know that it frustrates you, and that he can control that, so he’s utilizing that new found independence.
Or, it could be sensory issues. One thing I’ve learned from having a sensory kid (sensory seeking, also, sensory processing issues), is that the issues can take time to rear their ugly head, and they also wax and wane throughout their lives (mine’s going through sensory issues right now that didn’t formerly bother him). They did a sensory profile on my son at 16 months and he had virtually no sensory issues, and would eat ANY.THING. He wouldn’t really choose his food based on his likes or dislikes, he just ate (whereas my daughter, if you put several things on her plate, she’ll pick through her favorites, and then leave what she doesn’t like, or maybe eat a few of those, etc). And then one day, like that, he just.stopped. We went through a period between 16 and 20 months where he ate virtually nothing. I used to be able to put food in his mouth, and even if it wasn’t his favorite, he’d still chew and swallow it. Now there are certain foods that will make him gag and he’ll spit them out. He doesn’t like mushy slimy foods. Like peaches, blueberries, raspberries or anything along those lines with that texture. Yet he loves grapes and bananas. Go figure. Of course, part of it is age, because I have to bribe him to eat vegetables. He’ll eat raw carrots, but not cooked ones.
My daughter on the other hand, is a way pickier eater from the getgo. Granted, she’s still very young at 8 1/2 months, but she’s already off purees. Never cared much for them. Prefers to feed herself. Will eat her weight in peas, blueberries, and bananas if you let her. Oh and crackers. She’s just a different egg. Once I realized it was a pain to get her to eat purees, I just let her self feed. As a result, she’s learned to self feed early, and quite honestly, this is so much easier for all of us. She eats what she wants, and I don’t have to sit there and deal with the mess of purees.
I agree with Andi on getting an eval from your local Early Intervention type services to see if maybe he qualifies for OT. I think the younger you start dealing with it, the easier it’ll be to help him overcome it. If you wait until he’s two or three, they’re MUCH more stubborn and unwilling to give in. Three is just a pain in the ass age, I’m learning.
Heidi gags on certain textures of foods and oddly certain colours also set her off – orange is bad. We just don’t push her to eat anything that makes her gag. When she was a baby Heidi preferred to chew on the spoon than eat the food. š
Might be worthwhile following up with OT and Speech path about oral motor skills because as Andi said further up in the comments it might be something mild that he will quickly grow out of but if it is more serious then now is the time to act.
Reading BG’s comment Vonnie it sounds like this is an EDS issue and you sshould push for an appointment whilst that Doc is at the hospital that actually knows about EDS. Or sweetheart you will get down there and they wont have a clue. I like this post and did you see Statia’s last line? (Three is just a pain in the ass age, Iām learning.) heh. It is going to be bloody hot today. ack!
Bendy Girl – Thankyou. I’ve been wondering if it was EDS/laxity issues and you’ve confirmed that it might be.
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He does eat yogurt and likes it, (I forgot to mention that) as long as I am ready with a spoon to catch anything he might spit.
He doesn’t seem particularly gaggy, but he does not like swallowing.
I think I’m going to push for an earlier appointment, that said, we’ve got an appointment soon with the child health nurse and I will definitely be discussing it with her. She can refer to me IE if we need to.
I’m very lucky that my 11 1/2 month old will eat anything and everything however he does enjoy to chew it, take it out, examine it, sometimes offer it to me and then put it back in or if not throw it off the side of the highchair.
Sorry I couldn’t help anymore or offer any more advise. Good luck and fingers crossed he will start eating more soon.
I should add that he used to eat sandwiches/bread and eat all of it, but with the Coeliacs (reminds me, need to ring the hospital and get the latest blood results) that’s all off the menu.
I’m wondering now, because he’s not that gaggy anymore, if he was gaggy previously (I remember him gagging at bit at 6-7 months) if he’s learned to associate swallowing with gagging and has stopped trying to swallow for that reason. Along with the EDS.
No personal experience but have worked with several ch’n with speech issues related to lack of muscle tone and they’ve all had food issues similar to this, which made me immediately think of the EDS.
If he’s not loosing weight, I’d keep offering him a huge variety of food and try to be really light hearted and positive even if all he does it chew it up and spit it out. I def second/third? the idea of a speech assessment or OT… they will probably tell you he is too little for speech but push a bit if you have to. From what I’ve experienced the earlier you get some tips and advice the better if it might possible affect his speech and/or eating later on.
Of course it might also just be his ‘thing’ and no problem at all… but I’m a worrier so I’d err on the side of caution!
BTW – really think this is a great idea, there is such a wealth of information and experience from so many different people on the net. It can sometimes be hard to cope a few random judgemental people, but on the whole I reckon you’d get loads of good info and ideas to follow up.
Kate – definitely a wealth of information out there and it helps with people sharing their food issues too.
Statia – I think it might be a mix of both. Him learning that he can spit the food out (spitting it out to look at it, before occasionally putting it back in his mouth to chew) and sensory issues/EDS laxity in the throat.
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I think I’ll definitely be pushing the Paeds appointment up, just for Isaac so we can talk to the Paeds about it. I’d see the GP, but he knows very little about EDS, so he’s pretty useless.
I think this is a great idea, I only wish I could add more to the conversation. Stella has been incredibly slow to take to solid food and as a result of being on holiday for so long I ended up doing a version of baby led weaning. Now I serve her whatever I am giving Amy, just mushed up and she smears it on her head, around her face, on the highchair and the wall behind her! I think the suggestions to see a speech pathologist or an OT for a feeding assessment is a good place to start. Going back to the Dr who understands EDS is also a good idea.
It might be an EDS issue for all I know, but then, I have an almost-12-month-old who does not have EDS and who does a fair bit of the chew ‘n spit herself. With the sole exception of breakfast cereal mixed with pureed fruit (which she will eat from a spoon, with me feeding her, without comment each morning, although quantities vary), C only eats finger food, or at least food she can manouevre into her own mouth with fingers or a spoon.
Sometimes she seems hungry and will actually *eat* – last night, for instance, I gave her a bowl of pasta like her sisters were having (with tomato-mushroom sauce and mozzarella cheese) and was thrilled to see her put away a good 4-5 tablespoons full, which for her is HEAPS. Other times, like lunch today, she puts everything in her mouth, chews vigorously, sometimes even sucks on it for a while, then spits it out. I reckon she actually consumed maybe three small chunks of avocado, one little sliver of bread, and half a baby rice cake, if that.
Interestingly, like Isaac, she’s great with bananas. She eats at least half a banana a day and eats it very tidily and thoroughly. So if the issue is textural, bananas clearly pass muster in a big way!
She is healthy, developmentally ahead of her age, doing 3 breastfeeds a day – before morning nap, around 4pm, and bedtime – and one overnight or sometimes two (still big feeds too), and gaining weight steadily. She started in the 50th percentile for weight and has been between the 40th and 50th ever since. So TBH I am not greatly worried.
That said, it is frustrating so I’ll be keeping an eye on these comments to see if any magic ideas pop up š
I have no experience at all with EDS issues, so can’t comment on that. But, you’ve said he eats soft fruit quite well, just not the skins of them. So obviously he can swallow. No problem there that I can see. Vegetables and the fruit skins are more fibrous, so maybe it’s the texture that he can’t get past to the point of swallowing. Soft fruits tend to just slide down on their own after a bit of chewing. I have a similar problem with red meat, I can chew and chew and chew, but eventually I have to spit it out. I have vague memories of chewing for a long time at the table when I was little, can’t remember which food it was, but I’d suspect meat of some kind. I’d say don’t worry too much about it, he is only just one and it may be something that gets better as he matures. As for all the chewing, he’s gotten all the juice out of the veg and probably swallowed that so he’s got the goodness at least. For now just keep pureeing his veg to a thick soup consistency if that’s what he’ll eat. Check with your favourite health services and look into the EDS thing for your own peace of mind, but don’t stress too much until he’s older.
I started off reading all the comments but am posting now and will go back to them before I forget what I was going to say. Did read BG’s post and as a fellow EDSer both myself and daughter are the same as she with regard to swallowing, we both have a history of choking. It may be an EDS thing for Isaac it may be a phase. My youngest son without EDS would not eat solid food at all until he was two. He was underweight and this was a cause for concern for a long time.
I know you asked for any opinions so am going to give mine and hope its ok. This may sound odd but if this were me I think I would try and ignore it for a few months more. Babies pick up on stuff, even body language. I am not saying he is doing this but if you are at all anxious or are watching him to see if he is going to swallow, he will pick up on it. For a while I would try leaving food on his high chair and ‘busy’ myself washing up or similar and for one meal a day, lunch for example leave him to it. I wouldn’t say anything at all if he doesn’t eat. I know its hard to get one’s head around as worrying about nutrition and sustenance is a mother’s job. From recent photo’s he looks healthy so unless he appears to lose weight rapidly try not to worry. It may be also that his gums are hurting because there are teeth in there waiting to come out and chewing is associated at the minute with pain. I am just throwing stuff into the pot here Veronica. If he can eat fruit as you describe and swallow without choking or throwing up I think that probably means his swallow muscles ‘do’ work. I know this sounds really sexist but my boy child was a whole lot fussier about food and eating than his sister. He would projectile vomit everything and I mean everything, was the skinniest fussiest eater on the planet. I really understand how worrisome it can be. But Isaac is so young and he is getting sustenance so my honest opinion at the minute is don’t worry too much – easier said than done I know. My guess is that even if you did get an earlier appointment they would probably err on the side of caution and have a ‘wait and see’ attitude because he is thriving.
In a way ‘knowing’ about the EDS is a good thing but on the other hand I think it can create anxiety. Its hard for me to put into words for some reason why I think knowing can be just as hard as not. I suppose its because in a scenario such as this one wonders whether its an EDS ‘thing’ when if one was in blissful ignorance the tendancy would be to think – God you are a fuddy duddy little boy around food!
I would perhaps take the opportunity to not be the only one to feed him taking up every offer of someone else doing it. Or alternatively, because he is one I would just leave him to it to experience the whole food thing, letting him expirement at his own pace and not taking much notice, trying when practible to eat together as a family. So if he chooses to ‘taste and not swallow’ its no big deal. I do understand how hard it can be to let go and let them get on with it because of the worry of weight and nutrition. Because you have done so well to breast feed him for such a long time you have known that he is getting sufficient nutrition so now that he is becoming more independent and not relying wholly on you on this front its doubly hard.
Its really hard writing suggestions etc. but have done so because you said you didn’t mind on this occassion. I have written all this on the understanding that you know I am only giving my ‘thoughts’ not telling you what to do at all. I do know that children develop at different paces and even now despite the fact he is a teenager my youngest boy still has an aversion to certain food ‘touching’ each other on the plate.
I would keep your eye on it but if this were me (simply because I have been where you are now) and looking back I spent an awful lot of time worrying about nutrition and an extremely fussy eater that I think because I was stressed about it I was hypervigilant. I am not saying you are I would just hate to think that you even went near the stress levels I did over food and lack of solids with my youngest. I think Isaac is doing pretty well eating what he is at the minute. My boy basically drank and ate nothing until he was two.
Well thats me done. Am aware its a bitty comment full of well meant advice that as you read you probably think ‘oh give me a break why don’t you’. So I’ll be off and leave saying good luck with this and I so know where you are coming from. But agree with river in her last words entirely.
Hey Vonnie, it sounds like it might be a combination of EDS with the peristalsis (wave-like action of the digestive tract to process food through the body) , a previous issue Issac had with Coeliac’s making his gut scratchy/sore which he associates with food and he’s suss and he could have issues with other foods effecting his gut.
Friends and patients with Crohn’s and food intolerances explained how trigger foods effected them by feeling like sandpaper scratching its way through their digestive system, really leaving an impression on them.
Def push for an earlier appointment, it might be something or it might be nothing but in the long run it’s better to know for certain rather than double-guess everything you give him to eat.
This is such a great idea. Thank you for inviting us all in.
I don’t really know what to say on this one. My two are quite fussy eaters but don’t really have problems with chewing or swallowing. I think I would err on the side of caution and get him weighed, although having said that he certainly looks healthy. I wouldn’t worry too much about growth charts though – they’re based on bottle fed babies so would be irrelevant for Isaac. ALso, from other comments it sounds like it would be a good idea to talk to a Dr who knows about EDS.
And why will comment boxes not remember my new email address?! I keep forgetting to check when I hit submit comment.
Started to read comments but got distracted – forgive me if this is repeats. One of my kids started the spitting out thing at around two. She was able to say that the texture of some things bothered her, so she’d chew for the juice/flavor and spit out the rest. She got over that after maybe six months.
When my kids were around a year, I noticed they would chew and spit new foods. Like “I’ve only seen this ten times before so I don’t know if I can trust it yet” new. After they got used to it, they would swallow, but the chew/spit thing seemed kind of par for the course with approximating actually eating a new item. Also, one of my kids choked on a skin and was pretty adept at steering clear of skins after that until she got molars.
I don’t know if you should have it checked out. My kids don’t seem to have any further eating issues, but my red flag didn’t go off when I saw them doing the things they did. I say, trust your instincts. If it is worrisome after reading through your comments, have it checked out.
Hope this helps.
I don’t have experience with EDS. But, I do deal with sensory issues everyday–it could be sensory related. We have food therapy/therapists in the States and often are able to help kids with texture issues. Let us know what happens.
Andrew just turned 12 months old. He too has been spitting out his food! I have no idea why he does it either. He also tends to push away the spoon when he doesn’t want anything. (Not sure that’s the problem) He will take a bite, chew it, then he will decide he wants a drink then spit out the food that’s in his mouth. Then pick it up and chew it again! Gross I know! But even when I give him a snack of a food I know he likes, he still chews it then spits it out occasionally.
Luckily, I have an appointment with his Pediatrician on Tuesday and I will bring this up with her and see what she has to say. I’m really curious as to why all of a sudden he’s doing this!
PS: He was diagnosed with a submucosal cleft palate at his 9 month check. He had an appointment with an Ear, Nose and Throat doctor who told us it would cause no problems with feeding or speech, but now I’m wondering if that is the problem?!
If you find out anything please post it! Thanks!
hi v. I am coming to you from my mobile phone! The powers that be have cut off my internet because i owe them money.
Emily eats everything but she plays with it and chews it for ages first. Some things she chews for longer. The only reasons i can think of are that she enjoys the textures and that its helping calm her gums as her teeth come in.
also, Emily is now eating 4 meals a day, (weetbix, porridge,fruit puree, home made vegies with a bit of meat or fish) breastmilk, water, and formula as well.
She is 6.5kg and 8 months old.
She is heading down to the bottom of the healthy weight scale.
Do you think this is an issue?
Shes happy and bright-eyed.
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